The New Year Is But An Infant.

2014 slipped away.  Now a notation in history.

The New Year is but an infant.  Wide-eyed, curious and full of renewed hope for a better world.

Fireworks on the river Thames, London, England. The New Year in with a bang, a boom, a blaze of resplendent glory

As the light faded on the first day of the New Year, I stared out my bedroom window.  Noted the last remaining rays of the setting sun casting shadows on St. Luke's church in Leek, Staffordshire. Time to think about that new adventure, perhaps just a dream.  A dream of 2015 being the year that those who are vulnerable would no longer be targeted by those in power.  A New Year.  A New Hope. A year in which compassion, sharing, caring for all, was not that elusive dream but a wonderful new reality.  A year when the world realised that we should rejoice in the diversity of an all different, all equal world.

A peaceful, hopeful, positive New Year to you and your loved ones. 

Where You Be On That Tree?

I get a fair amount of emails that relate to mental health well being. They send me encouragement, support, understanding and gratitude. I'm touched by it all and experience a wide range of emotions. They appreciate my willingness to speak openly, transparently of my own mental health issues. Issues that are only a small part of who I am. There's a lot of pain out there. There's also a lot of hope.

At the bottom of this posting, if you so wish, are the backlinks that relate to mental health well being. If you're struggling, might desire some positive reinforcement, the backlinks may well be of help.

I have worked for a number of mental health charities, ran a men's group for the homeless, the rough sleepers and worked as a drugs counsellor, primarily with those who were addicted or worried about their alcohol intake.

The above illustration was sometimes used in discussion.  In a way, it fits into that ongoing, Tree of Life: Branching Out, collaboration. I will state, before somebody mentions it, the above illustration is not of Casper the friendly ghost and a collection of his spirited friends. Which means, if you ask which one is Casper, don't ask. Which means someone will now ask.

Just out of interest, think which one represents you on that tree and what that signifies.  .

Below are the links to the previous postings in chronological order. I hope, if you've never read them before, or want to reread them, they will be of some comfort. Thank you and remember, through awareness, through understanding, reaching out and helping each other, we can realise a better world.

We Are All In This Together.

Recognising Our Validity.

Improving Your Self-Esteem.

A Motivational Goal.

Beyond The Window.

It had been a windswept, rainy night.  The clouds passed.  The rain stopped.  Sprinkled droplets splashed upon yon window.  The street lamp cast an eerie glow.

Lessons have been learnt.  Those who would devalue our humanity, shall never, ever kill the good in the human spirit.  Together, in hope, we cope.  You, my friend, have shared that lesson.  Thank you.

And beyond the window, I saw the universe.

I Cannot Go Back There.

I'm not a well man.  I have mental and physical issues to contend with.  Like so many, I'm now experiencing the hell the British government is imposing on the sick, the poor, the vulnerable, the disabled.  All in the name of cost cutting while the incompetent fortunate smirk at the plight of the impoverished.  Many now live in fear, fear of keeping their houses warm, fear that they might not have enough to eat.  Scared to the point of hysterical panic that they might lose their homes.  Many are now living in fear of what tomorrow brings.  I am one of them.

In between my visits as a hospital outpatient over my medical problems, I'm now being summoned for the dreaded medical assessment that has wreaked havoc with so many desperate, frightened souls.  Several people have been deemed fit to work, when in reality, they are not.  If I am deemed fit to work, it will destroy me.  Workplace bullying in various jobs, both paid and voluntary, have left me in a state of deep despair.  

And the ripple effects of all of this?  My son, my beloved son, who through this economic mess, cannot find meaningful employment.  He continues on with his drawn out process of enlisting with the British Navy.  In the meantime, my young man cannot sleep properly, he is sad and it's breaking my heart.  My mother, my family in British Columbia, are worried sick over what's happening to me and my boy.  I do my best, with their support, to see a positive aspect to all of this.  

It's so exhausting.  I'm barely able to write a posting.  I'm barely able to interact within this supportive, caring blogging community.  My transparency, my verbalisation are important.  In my world, the truth is I struggle to sleep and I'm often still awake around ten in the morning.  Finally, I drift off and wake up in a panic about four in the afternoon.  I was starting to get better and then this government and its inhumane policies brought it all back with a vengeance.

Maybe my medical assessment will be okay.  I have to cling onto that thought.  I cannot go back there.  Back to that dark, foreboding place where I was so ill, the only comfort was the sound of a whirring fan by my bedside.  A fan that played the music of a man losing his sanity.  What has this world come to when they dredge up the past, the past I tried to move on from.  

No matter what, I have to, I must not let the evil bombard my right to a peaceful, positive life. With your help and caring, with my family's support, with the focus that I need to maintain a healthy environment for my son and for Penny, our beautiful dog, I will keep going.  

I'm a teardrop of the shining orb

Which has a message I must absorb

A glowing tear

Beyond the fear.

A Motivational Goal.

This is another article in my series on mental health well being.  If you missed the other postings and would like to read them, they are in the links at the bottom of this posting.

Today's topic is about Motivation.

Motivation, the driving force behind your desire to accomplish a goal in your life.  Motivation is the ability to inspire others and yourself to achieve or maintain a more positive life.

1 :  Take small steps :  Set and achieve mini-goals with the focus on a major goal.  Succeeding at mini-goals, helps reinforce further motivation.

2 :  See things through :  A partially finished project is of no use to anybody.  Quitting can become a habit.  Instil the habit of finishing projects.

3 :  Favourable friends :  The attitude of your friends can influence your attitude.  If they can't be bothered to make an effort, there is a possibility you will be the same way.  Thus, if you want to progress, you have to be surrounded by people who want to progress and encourage your progression.  Favourable friends will motivate you and you will motivate them.

4 :  Learn new skills :  New goals may require the acquisition of new knowledge.  The learning of new skills can enhance your motivation to realise your major goal or goals.

5 :  Fifteen minutes a day :  You don't have to spend hours and hours to accomplish goals.  You may discover that the greatest progress is the sum total of a series of small efforts.  Try and spend about fifteen minutes each day doing something that gets you closer to realising your goal.

6 :  Take a venture :  Yes, nothing ventured, nothing gained.  Failure can be the motivation behind learning from your mistakes.  Mistakes do not define you.  What you learn from your mistakes, defines you.

7 :  Positive affirmations :  Remind yourself of your goals everyday.  Have a one-sentence affirmation for your goals.  Using such an affirmation can keep you focused on the visualisation of your goal.  It can become a natural way of thinking.

8 :  Break your goals down :  Goals can be given up on because they seem overwhelming.  If your goals seem to be a daunting prospect, it's a good idea to break them down into smaller, realistic, achievable tasks.

9 :  Get it written down :  To see your goals written down and the progress you're making, will help motivate and help your chances of making your goals come to fruition.

10 :  Review your goals :  Ask yourself challenging questions.  If the progress towards your goal is not as you would of hoped for, what's impeding your progress?  It may well be that your priorities have altered and a particular goal may no longer seem applicable.  You might consider a rethink and concentrate your energy of a goal more conducive to how you are now.

11 :  Treat yourself :  Each occasion you achieve a goal,  give yourself a reward.  Knowing that you are going to have a treat at the end of your goal, is quite the motivation.

12 :   Savour the moment and  enjoy your success :  Validate the fact that you have achieved your goal. Take time out to really enjoy and reflect upon your accomplishment.  This will help invigorate you and renew your energetic enthusiasm to move on with other goals.  Positive momentum, indeed!

Through faith, hope, willingness, support and friendship, we are motivated.  To be motivated you must have a genuine desire.  Motivation is about focused dedication to gain a positive outcome.  Motivation continues through inspiration from others and inspiration from within.  We can all motivate each other to realise our goals.

And the photo at the top.  I look out my bedroom window and I have the motivation to get out there and be a part of it all.

Here are the links to the other postings in this series.

We Are All In This Together.

Recognising Our Validity.

Improving Your Self-Esteem.

Not In Vain.

Wayward flakes of snow gently float and paint the scene from dreary green to glowing white.  Out yon window, the moon casts shadows.  Snow of white becomes snow so blue.

And the muffled, the hushed silence, created by the falling snow, enhances thoughts of hope, of dreams becoming reality.

Son sleeps soundly in his room.  Beloved dog, breathing softly, curled upon her comfort blanket.  Ticking clock...pendulum beats, to the rhythm of my heart.

I gazed out my kitchen window.  So early in the morning.  Snowflakes drifted.  One last mug of hot chocolate, complete with extra marshmallows.  I thought about how determined I was to make this a positive year and I thought back upon Christmas Day when I was there for others and others were here for me.  With that, the following words danced around in my mind....

Tears stream,
Cheeks stain,
What I dream,
Was not in vain.

Improving Your Self-Esteem.

Greetings friend, in my previous post, Recognising Our Validity, I discussed the subject of self-esteem and how you evaluated your own life. If your self-esteem has you feeling good about your life and those you interact with, the following can be considered positive reinforcement.  If you are struggling and are experiencing low-esteem, due to a number of environmental factors, the following may help inspire you to have the determination to make some choices for the benefit of your overall well being.

Positive Resources And Distractions To Improve Self-Esteem.

.  Identify and accept your strengths and weaknesses. We all have them.

.  Set yourself realistic goals and accomplish them by acquiring new skills.

.  Be good to yourself.  Thinking of others is wonderful, but not at the cost of your own personal wants and needs. This is not selfish, but a chance to look after your well being.

.  Be happy in your own company and focus on positive distractions.

.  Reinforce your right to say 'no'.

.  Realise a 'can-do' approach to help develop and work on your personal goals and aspirations.

.  Take pride in who you are. Delve into, acknowledge and appreciate your own personal differences, talents and achievements. Take pride in your accomplishments, both big and small.

.  Accept and and learn from your mistakes. Do not overreact  to your mistakes and become disillusioned by them. See mistakes not as a barrier, but an opportunity, a chance to grow and improve your life.  Do not be discouraged by mistakes. Try to find the less serious side of an error.

.  Remove negative 'self-talk', the negative 'inner critic' and replace such thinking with positive statements that  validate your right to be happy.

.  Practice positive affirmations. Reinforce them whenever you are having those moments of despair or for positive reinforcement. Everyday and in every way, you are getting better and better.

.  If you experience rejection, step back and try and look at it from a different perspective. Try not to take it personally.

.  Involve yourself with people who are conducive to a positive, healthy environment. Try to distance yourself from negative people who would undermine you, rather than respect your validity.

.  Know that your personal rights, your opinions, your beliefs and ideas are just as credible as any other person.

To summarise, remember this is your life and you have the right to live it in a peaceful, positive, fulfilling way. An honest assessment of your life and what you wish to do to make adjustments, are there for the taking.

If you are content with your self-esteem, that is most encouraging,  May you continue to realise a positive life and be of help to those who need some comfort.  If you are struggling with low self-esteem, I hope some of the above points and some you can come up with yourself, are of inspirational value.

Embracing The Ambience.

I sat on the sofa and absorbed the view, that snuggles in my mind, through a rain splashed window.  Tis a sight to behold, that wondrous tree, tree of tinted brown and orange leaves.  I listened to the garden's symphony.  And the wind, such gentle, playful wind, danced merrily through creaking branches and rustling leaves.  The rhythm, the music of nature, the orchestra of wind, trees and the tap, tap, tap of the rain, that cascaded upon yonder window, created such tranquil melody.   What a beautiful world we live in.

And thus, this early November day, was transforming into night.  The sun, that glorious glowing orb, bid a fond farewell and drifted away.  Drifted away to that magical place where the earth, the sky and our star, meet as one.  I lit a candle.  A symbolic beacon of hope.  Hope that one day, we all live in a world full of peace and joy.

It was now very late.  I stared at the eerie shadows cast upon the wall.  The pendulum swung back and forth. Soothing music absorbed my senses, and I travelled.  Travelling through thoughts, destined to arrive at that place called happy memories.   Calmness immersed me, washed over me, like a tender wave from tropical seas.   It was such a lovely evening.

It was now a new morning.  Outside my kitchen window I noted the quiet hush of a sleepy town.  I looked at the street lamps through rain splashed window.  Each lamp, a ghostly, glowing apparition.  Soon sleep would beckon me, call my name.   Time to sleep and dream beautiful dreams of the day just gone.
A positive environment starts from within.  I have been embracing the ambience, the wonder and the marvel, that life presents to me, in so many enchanting ways.  I hope you do the same.

Stigmas And Stereotypes.

It seems to me we have some ways to go. The stigmas and the stereotypes, the foregone conclusions that certain segments of society perceive about mental health issues, is still prevalent.

There are people who are suffering with mental illness. They will not seek the help that is available. For, because of society's perceptions, they are too ashamed to admit they desperately need help in their world that is falling apart. To suffer is silence, out of fear of people's reactions; is a sad reflection on an indifferent, dismissive society.

It makes me wonder, and, perhaps it makes you wonder, just what it takes for the stigmas and the stereotypes to be eliminated. Mental illness can happen to anyone. Those that would mock individuals with mental health concerns, who think it is a form of weakness, I would urge them to think again. To those who think we should 'get a grip', it is not that straightforward, it is not that simple. To those who think that they would not be vulnerable to an overwhelming negative environment, think again.

Once upon a time, I thought that mental illness only happened to others. I was a 'tough guy', tough enough to overcome any obstacles that blocked my pathway. I was wrong. I was overwhelmed with a hysterical sense of doom. I fell apart, my confidence and self-worth became an insignificant speck, deep inside the mind of a tormented man. Relentless workplace bullying took its toll on my ever increasing fragile state of mind. I became a failure to my wife, I nearly broke the heart of our little boy who saw his Daddy becoming a weak, frightened little man.

Through sheer determination, and the vital help of those who empathise, somehow I stifled the flames of a mental inferno that came so close to engulfing me. Yes, I am still not very well, yet I realise that my mental illness is only a small portion of who I am. I can choose how much of my life it controls.

So this tough guy got humbled by his illness. To those who know me, who mock me, yet fear me; I wonder what the mocking is all about. Do these people who think me weak really believe that they could handle a negative environment that tries to drown their humanity? Do they fear me because they think I might have a funny turn and attack them? Do they think my mental illness is contagious? Do they fear me because they have concerns about their own mental health?

It is our responsibility to create a more positive environment. The mental health wellbeing of all of us depends upon it. It is time for those who continue to label us with stigmas and stereotypes to understand that a friendly, more understanding, more compassionate and respectful society will benefit all mankind.

Environmentally Friendly.

My garden became environmentally friendly.  It took a great amount of hard work, determination and a clear focus of what I wanted to create.  I had a dream and that dream was to transform my garden from a place of squalor to a place of splendour.  After countless hours of dedication, one man and his shovel, produced a sanctuary for his soul.  The birds, the bees and the butterflies discovered a place of harmonious tranquility.

We hear a lot about being environmentally friendly.  Making sure that we use goods and services that will have minimal impact on the environment.   We are asked to do our bit to conserve energy and recycle used products.  We are told that we should walk, use public transport, instead of using the car.  This is all well and good that our legacy should be that we leave a greener, cleaner planet for future generations.

But what about a positive environment?  Should this not be an ideal for all of us?  A negative environment can do great damage to the mind, body and soul.  Indifference, apathy, indeed to devalue the credibility of our fellow man, compounds the problem of a negative environment.   

Now is the time to think 'green' in our minds.  It's about making peace with our inner environment so that this, in turn, will make our outer environment a better place for all mankind.   We can become environmentally friendly to each other and reap the rewards of a world that embraces and rejoices in our individuality.  All different, all equal.

The cynic might argue that there is no point in having such altruistic visions because the world is beyond hope.  The cynic will tell us that people have their own self interests and only care about themselves.  With such attitudes, the lack of caring for our fellow man, can only intensify.  This would be very sad.

Some might say I'm delusional.  That we must be resided in the fact that those cynical of such ideals, will be proven to be correct.  So do we continue along the road to an increased negative inevitability?

Well I know and you know, that we do have a choice.  Together, we can become environmentally friendly, to save our planet from the impact of climate change.  Together, we can become environmentally friendly towards each other.   With inner peace, we shall exude outer peace that will produce that positive environment I so crave for all humanity.