Tuesday 10 February 2015

The Talking Feral Fridge.

This will be the last post I ever publish on this computer. A computer now so slow that I find myself trying to will the bloody thing to load up by spinning the wheel on my mouse.  A mouse as in a computer mouse, although both can be rather fond of wheels.  

Trying to get to your site and comment has become a frustrating, flustered futility.  

So, for no apparent reason whatsoever, I shall publish one of my coolest posts ever to end the usage of this computer.  
I'm sure you have observed that fridges do indeed "talk."  I mentioned the uniqueness of each fridge's "voice" in a previous post.  The above fridge is my old fridge.  The above, old fridge now resides at my son Tristan's new place.  The old fridge makes a sound like a squealing pig with a rumbly tummy.  That sound can now continue to delight my son.  
My new fridge, which I've been told is classified as a "domestic appliance" doesn't seem domestic at all.  I would consider it, if anything, that the screeching sounds are more reminiscent of a wild animal than a domestic appliance..  The noises emanating could, however, be considered the sound of a "gross domestic product."

My new feral frost-free fridge fluctuates flatulence factors forebodingly.  Yes, in other turds, in other words, it can sound like a gurgling fart.

It also has this uncanny knack of sounding like Penny the Jack Russell dog and modest internet superstar in one of her whining moments.

I heard that whining noise the other day.  "Are you okay, Penny?"  I inquired.  Only to suddenly realise that Penny wasn't with me and I was talking to the talking feral fridge.

A Fridge Too Far
How very polar
Fridge on the River Kwai 
Um, nice try
A Fridge over Trouble Waters
It never falters
No surprise
The Fridge of Sighs.