Saturday, 24 April 2010
Non-Stick Frying Pans.
Behold the 'non-stick' frying pan. Pictured are the remnants of bacon and eggs that got stuck on a 'non-stick' frying pan. In fact, according to my calculations, twenty seven full English breakfasts have been left stuck on our 'non-stick' frying pan. Eggs over easy? I don't think so. More like, eggs wont turn at all. And the spatula to aid in the removal and flipping of food in the 'non-stick' frying pan? Forget it. Suddenly, I'm thinking, to hell with it and start contemplating the merits of a chisel.
Each time I purchase a 'non-stick frying pan; the instructions are read meticulously. "Don't put empty pan on a hot burner or in a heated oven. Don't put a hot pan in cold water or pour cold water on it. Leave to cool before washing in hot, soapy water. Avoid metal utensils and do not use scouring pads, steel wool or abrasives when cleaning non-stick pans. Always use plastic, nylon or wooden utensils. Use a low to medium heat. Too much heat will cause food to burn and may damage the non-stick surface. Wash pan immediately after use. (What? I thought I read a sentence above that noted to leave to cool before washing). Leave parts to soak before trying to remove stubborn food residue." Okay, done all that. No joy. Where the heck is the chisel and maybe a stick of dynamite?
And now for something that has nothing to do with the title of this posting. I have noticed that solar lamps are not the most reliable of product. Pictured are solar lamps, or, if you prefer, 'unsolar' lamps. This is the unsolar lamp section of my garden. Each non functioning unsolar lamp will, however, be utilised. Each one will have a pretty little flower placed in it. So all is not lost.
Sadly, the solar lamps that do work are being targeted. The thing is that birds are no longer happy shitting on my head. Birds now shit on my solar lamps. Bird shit on solar lamp equals complete lack of cute glowing light. I have a suspicion that birds and cats are conspiring against me in my garden. Birds crap on the lamps. Cats crap in my vegetable patch.
One more thing that has absolutely nothing to do with the title of this posting. Have you ever noticed that the vacuum cleaner wont suck up that one piece of fluff? You try several times. Finally, you give up and stick the piece of fluff into your jean's trouser pocket, which is already stuffed full of used tissue paper. You then put your jeans in the washing machine that keeps flooding and find all your clothes covered in fluff and tissues that you put in the washing machine that keeps flooding.