Friday, 4 December 2009
A Cynics' Christmas Party.
"A cynic is not merely one who reads bitter lessons from the past; he is one who is prematurely disappointed in the future." Sidney J. Harris, American Journalist.
A very reluctant, somewhat indifferent welcome to the 'Cynics' Christmas Party'. In a few moments, I will introduce you to the folks who bothered to show up to this little farce posing as some kind of Christmas party. You know, a Christmas party, like the office Christmas party, where everybody has a good time, smiles, laughs and says how wonderful you are. That would ofcourse be the same people who actually hate your guts but put on a false smile, through gritted teeth and wish you a 'merry Christmas' and a 'happy New Year'. Yes indeed a fine collection of 'workmates', one tried to get you sacked, one had sex with your partner and one stole a doughnut from your lunchbox.
I will now give you the great pleasure of meeting this happy lot. Ofcourse they don't know you, so they, unlike the Christmas parties you have been to in the past, have not had the chance to hate your guts. But hey, give em' time, no doubt, they will soon dislike you.
Sitting over there looking totally disinterested with proceedings is that big fan of Christmas known as 'The Grinch'. Now the Grinch is a bitter, cave-dwelling chap, who lives high up on a mountain just outside of a town named Whoville. He despises the warm-hearted 'Whos' and their nauseating love of Christmas. With his only companion, his dog Max, he plans to dress poor Max up as a reindeer, use him to pull his sleigh and steal all the trappings associated with the festive season. No gifts, no decorations, no Christmas. That would be right, wouldn't it?
Perhaps the Grinch might say hello to you. Perhaps not.
Sitting over there looking even more disinterested, if that's possible, is another lover of this jolly season. Let me introduce you to Ebenezer Scrooge. Maybe Mr. Scrooge will say something. Mr. Scrooge goes off on a rant: "Why I came here, I don't know. I could have been back at my office working out more ways to make even more money. On Christmas Day, I shall have that idle loafer employee of mine, Mr. Cratchit working. Christmas is just another day and I need to make more money."
The cynics' Christmas party has not been that well attended this year. Matter of fact, all who bothered to show up were these two fine examples of the Christmas spirit, or lack of. The wicked witch of the west was evidently stuck under a house, whilst Montgomery Burns was too busy watching Homer Simpsons' activites, or lack of, on his closed circuit television. Heck, we even tried to bring in an 'off-the-wall' comedian, to liven things up, sadly, 'Humpty Dumpty' cracked at the last moment.
You know what? I got this feeling that the Grinch and Mr. Scrooge are going to have a rethink about their cynical ways. I believe that soon they will discover that Christmas is so much more than gifts and decorations. They will learn not to be bitter and envious of folks who are trying to be happy. Happiness is a right for all of us....and that includes the Grinch and Ebenezer Scrooge.