Tester Pot.

The other day I decided to move around the paintings in my home. I am pleased to the point of outrageous euphoria with the results. Now, I like to think that my art's in the right place.
Talking about painting, I decided to check out paint for my walls at the local hardware store. There was all this paint in an overwhelming array of choices. There were large tins, medium tins, small tubs and tiny pots of paint. "That's strange" I thought, "what's with the tiny pots? Are they for folks with really small rooms? Or, perhaps they are paint pots for pixies, gloss for garden gnomes or maybe, just maybe, latex for the little folks of Lilliput?"
Somewhat confused, I went over and asked an assistant about the tiny pots of paint. With a pot of bathroom paint in hand, I stated: "My goodness, you would have to have one heck of a small bathroom for this tub of paint to be enough." "Oh no sir. This is what we call a tester pot. You try it on part of the wall and see if the colour is to your liking" responded the assistant. I think she realised that I was just having a bit of fun. Her smile, her laughter, made me think I had brought a bit of good-natured zaniness into her day. Tester pot...hmmm...which ofcourse must not be confused with 'pot tester'.
Now for a brief interlude of totally disjointed observations which have absolutely nothing to do with the title of this blog. "More than 200 people ignored the showers yesterday (Good Friday, 10, April, 2009) to attend the World Marble Championships at Tinsley Green.
The annual event has been taking place at the Greyhound Inn on Good Friday since 1932. Defending champions the Yorkshire Meds, from Leeds, won the world title again. One of their team, Halim Tata, also won the individual competition. See the Crawley Observer and Crawley Times for a full report." Well all I can say about that is "how marbleous!" Apparently. one of the chaps on the winning team is a bit of a joker. You might say, a Marble comic character.
Three songs that have always left me bewildered. 1: 'You're so vain' ('You probably think this song is about you') by Carly Simon. 2: 'I'd do anything for love' ('But I won't do that') by Meat Loaf. 3: 'Dueling Banjos', from the movie 'Deliverance'. Dueling Banjos? Huh?
Okay, the disjointed interlude is over. I had a 'Pot Noodle' the other day and didn't feel any different. Whoops..back to the paint theme. So I'm considering doing some touch-up painting around my home. I have even considered going back over the wood trim with the 'brilliant white' paint that looked great for about year. Now it looks neither white nor brilliant. More like a sick shade of yellow. This blog that was almost about the joys of painting, is drawing to a conclusion. I second that emulsion.

Filling The Vacuum.

My sincerest apologies for not exactly taking a decent quality photograph. However, you must understand that our 'zippity doo hah' dog, 'Penny' the Jack Russell, has an intense hatred for the vacuum cleaner. So to even get her near the 'blue beast', is quite the accomplishment. The above picture was rather hurried and Penny was soon gone the heck out of the living room. The vacuum, in spite of the dog's apprehension, was most cooperative in having its photo snapped. You might say a 'sucker' for attention.
I have reached the conclusion that our canine friends do not appreciate the ironic situations that can present themselves in everyday life. I have mentioned in a previous blog, that if our dog did not shed so much hair, the usage of the dreaded whirring machine would be less frequent. But does she stop shedding less hair? Does she attempt to grab the useless dog brush and rid herself of those pesky hairs? Well, ofcourse not. So thanks to her and those mystery hairs; I spent the previous hour vacuuming one small part of the carpet, over and over and over again.
I have tried to use the dog brush, (on her, not me), all to no avail. I brush and I brush and I brush some more. So when the end result is no hairs on said brush, I resort to grabbing great clumps out with my hands. I have tried bathing her and the end result is a wet dog with wet hair. Some clever chap suggested that I vacuum the dog. Uh...no!
Now then. lets 'paws' and change the theme in this blog for a bit. I have been known to do disjointed blogs and so here we go....Sir Galahad and Sir Lancelot walked into 'Yee Olde Inn'. "My good innkeeper. We require a room for two knights." said Sir Lancelot. "That is fine. You can pay for your lodgings upon your departure" replied the innkeeper. The next morning, Sir Galahad and Sir Lancelot approached the innkeeper. "We wish to pay for our lodgings, my good man" said Sir Galahad. Looking rather perplexed, the innkeeper responded: "Oh, I thought you wanted a room for two nights?"
Now then, where were we? Oh yeah. Maybe some scientist can explain to me why, when I attempt to vacuum up the dog hairs, that they suddenly have this ability to hook themselves into the fibre of the carpet. "Come on Penny. I think it would be very nice if you became friends with the vacuum cleaner? Penny? Penny? Where are you? Penny, why are you hiding under my duvet?"

Never Lose.

Never lose. Never lose that passion of excitement that beats within you. Never lose that thirst for knowledge that keeps you alive. Never lose the childlike joy you have for the wonders of nature. Deep within us glows that battling spirit that will never be extinguished. Embrace, experience the euphoria that still speaks to you in the depths of your heart. Never lose.
You may have thought their is no hope in a hopeless world. Yet is this world that we create so hopeless? Are we so helpless that we let waves of negativity immerse us in relentless despair? We have choices. It is time to rejuvenate that flickering flame, allow it to burn brightly with renewed vigour. Let us focus on renewal of our humanity, our validity, our self-respect. Let us hold our heads high and rejoice in the beautiful music that still plays a positive tune in our souls.
Together, we can formulate inspiring songs in our human orchestra. We can do what we may have considered beyond our wildest dreams, indeed introduce to those who would be cynical of our altruism, an orchestra more profound, more poignant than any melody heard by mankind. For now is the time for those of us who have been undermined and dismissed, to bring to the world an orchestra of understanding. We are all great musicians, and together as one, we will spread the power of empathy.
Our lives can be an adventure rather than a misadventure. It is a new day, a new dawn, a fresh hope. That insatiable appetite, that quest for happiness, must not be diminished. The inner child is still there, curios and innocent. Smile in the knowledge that you are a good person. Understand that you have the right to be happy and live in peace. Turn what appears to be a negative into something that radiates positivity. Believe in yourself and you will never lose.

Gnome Sweet Gnome.

With the radiance of excitement, I prepared myself for the annual 'oh good grief, what has happened to my beautiful garden?' tidy up ritual. It is amazing just how tired and messy a garden can be after another dreary winter.
Yet now it is spring here in Britain. Ah spring and all sorts of words spring to mind. Spring rolls, spring chicken, spring onions, Jerry Springer. I once had a tin of spring chicken soup. Trouble was that when I went to put on the can opener; the can of soup sprung into the air and bashed me in the eye.
The weather here has been very nice. Soaking in the rays of the warm sunshine, I wander around my garden. I observe the beauty, listen to the birds sing, hear the gentle breezes whistling through the trees and feel contentment as the wind chimes play a merry tune. Ah the joys of spring and a renewal of nature as it emblazes the land with wondrous colour.
Yes, the weather has been remarkably pleasant lately. One particularly pleasing sunny day a chap made a comment to me: "Hey up! It's hot in the sun." Well not one to be pedantic, however, just this once, I thought to myself: 'Ofcourse it's hot in the sun. Matter of fact the temperature at the centre of our local glowing orb is 27,000 degrees fahrenheit or 15,000 degrees centigrade.' Ofcourse, no matter which temperature measurement you prefer; that is pretty darn hot.
Now then, let's end this blog with some random garden thoughts. Why do they call them bedding plants? I expect them to have matching sheets, pillow cases and a nice duvet to be included in the purchase price. Why is alright for cats to run wild through my garden and use it as a public convenience? (which to me and many others is an inconvenience). Why don't responsible lovers of cats take the flippin' things for walks? Why is 'Gnome' spelt with a 'G'?
In closing, look at the smile on my friend, the garden Gnome. What a sweet smile. Gnome sweet Gnome.

Assertive Diplomacy.

If you have been conditioned to believe that your opinion, your concerns, have little or no validity, you may find using assertion skills to be a most daunting proposition. For if your self esteem has taken relentless battering, the very idea of expressing yourself in an assertive manner, may challenge the uncomfortable comfort zone you have placed yourself in.
After many years of feeling worthless, more years than I care to remember, I managed, somehow, to find within me the ability to realise that my right to expression, was an ability to be nurtured. So I had a choice. Would I let the perpertrators continue to undermine me? Would I go back under the duvet and believe those who dismissed me as irrelevant, were right in ignoring my humanity? I could not allow this to happen any longer. I discovered my self-respect.
In times of rather unfortunate disagreement, I maintain my composure. I have learnt assertive diplomacy. With this newly found confidence, I may have been tempted to sway from assertion to potential aggression Allow me to give you a 'real time' example. Right now, my son is in his room with his somewhat loud friends. Because I want to do this blog without distraction, I have put on headphones. So to the gentle tones of 'Little River Band', I continue to type away. However, someone is on a mobile phone. I'm getting awful buzzing feedback. I will be right back....
Okay then, I had three ways of sorting out the annoyance that is coming through my headphones. 1: I could have tried to ignore the noise and get on with it. 2: I could have become aggressive. 'Knock! knock!' "Hey you 'effin pond life...get off that bloody mobile phone..I'm trying to do my blog and even with the headphones on, you guys, who make a dirt-eating worm seem like Albert 'effin Einstein, are still invading my space!...turn off that mobile before I shove it somewhere that will make the sound rather muffled! Do you understand!?" 3: Practice assertive diplomacy. "Excuse me gentleman, I am trying to do a blog but I am getting distortion through my headphones. Would you be so kind as to finish your call fairly soon? Thank you."
Now I most definitely do not recommend option 2. Aggression, using statements starting with 'you', can cause the other person to feel the need to retaliate with equal verbal aggression. This is most unconstructive. If, however, we use assertion with statements that use the pronoun 'I', then we take responsibility, indeed ownership of our actions. This way, ideally, we can have positive interaction displayed in a cool, calm and assured way.
Assertive diplomacy can have any number of the following elements. Verbal communication, with a dash of charm and humour, should be stated in such a way that minimises confusion. We have to practice active listening. If we are to get our point across, we must appreciate that communication is a two-way process. Our 'body language' also plays a vital part in any interaction. This non-verbal form of communication, the gestures we use, conveys a great deal of what we are trying to express.
If we can incorporate good eye contact, maintain a relaxed body posture, use a clear voice and tone, we can, in most circumstances realise that assertion pays dividends. It is just a matter of challenging anxiety and knowing, no matter the outcome, we have reinforced our dignity, our self-respect.
My positive journey continues. May your own positive journey continue to grow in strength.

The World Turns.

The world turns, the sun sets and another day ends. In the gathering darkness, shadows from that place beyond my window, dance upon the walls. As the light grows ever dimmer, thoughts glow in my mind.
Has this been another day of negative energy? Or has the time on my own, contemplating a better future, been a time. truly well spent? As I get ready for sleep, I supress the negative 'chatter' that sabotages my positive thoughts.
To those that traumatised me, bullied me, played on my vulnerable state. I say, shame on them, for they will never, ever again, impose on my right to a better life.
The world turns, the sun sets and another day ends. Tomorrow brings new hope, new possibilities. At the dawning of the new day, we make a choice. Do we breathe in the fresh air of positive thoughts? Or do we give a negative environment permission to drown us in a sea of torment? The world turns, and with the new light, we see that if we are here for each other, we are here for ourselves.

One man lives and one man dies,
One child laughs and one child cries,
One man hates and one man loves,
One child sees war and one child sees doves.

Negative Speculation.

I was travelling back to my home loaded down with shopping items. I checked my watch and realised that the school I had to walk by, was just about to close. This meant the mayhem that is the after school rush. If I picked up the pace, I reckoned there just might be a chance of avoiding the mayhem that is the after school rush.
As I neared the school, it became apparent that I was most likely going to be used as a convenient target to bump into. It had happened before, so I prepared myself. Prepared myself for the onslaught of screaming youngsters and the excitable, animated adults that had come to fetch them.
Now in Britain, American or Canadian 'football' is not exactly a sporting pastime. I chuckled to myself as I thought about the good old days when I used to play football and was very good at avoiding being tackled. (Heck, when a dude the size of a truck is heading towards you, it is a very good idea to avoid being tackled). Judging by what lay before me, a 'gridiron' uniform, complete with a helmut, may have been adequate protection. Well almost. Hmmm...Gary the 'gridiron gladiator'.
So, resided in the fact that getting past the school and onto the freedom of my home, was going to be a bit of an obstacle course, I bravely moved closer to the teeming mass of humanity. A little girl, about six years old, ploughed into me. "Watch where you're going!" yelled the man who was with her. I smiled and said to him, as I pointed further down the road: "Wish me luck." "What did you say? You got a problem?" he screamed at me. I repeated myself. All I was trying to do was see the funny side of what lay before me. He mumbled something and continued on his way.
I am a very sensitive person. This really shook me up. It had been a good day, sadly that one moment had caused me much anxiety. At times we can be guilty of assuming the worst. I had experienced an example of someone assuming the worst, when all I wanted was for him to realise the best. Perhaps he heard what he wanted to hear. If we choose to hear what we want to hear, we may not hear what is really spoken.
Negative speculation breeds a negative environment. Realistic, positive anticipation will make us, will make the world, a better place.