The door that had kept me closed in, trapped in my own anxiety, laced with a liberal dose of negative speculation, is now ever so slightly open. Through the ever so slightly opened door, I embrace that glimmer of a new hope in a new reality.
The past year and a half have tested my mental health well being to the wildest, scariest extremes of paranoid, panicky despair. Government bureaucracy, lack of communication, passport problems and the what feels like the never ending saga of staring at planks, at scaffolding......
The anxiety, oh the anxiety lingers. The past year and a half have impacted me profoundly. And yet, I've battled against the injustice that toyed with my right to a peaceful, positive life. Despite struggling with the overwhelming sense of being imprisoned in my own very personal world of impending insanity, I'm nearly back. I'm amazed at my resilience as I now have my benefit entitlements sorted. That is such a relief.
As for the scaffolding and the planks outside my apartment, I've been informed that they will start working on the roof in February, 2018. By the time it's all over, I will have been stuck staring at the wood and metal monstrosity for ten months! It transpires that there has been an insurance claim issue as to who is responsible for the cost of fixing the roof.
The recovery after such a tedious, tumultuous time will be one of gently taking care of myself. The mental and physical exhaustion makes typing every word one small yet significant triumph in my passionate desire to get on with my life.
For the next little while, my posts will still be sporadic at best. Although, the wee folks have assured me that they will be doing there annual Christmas wish posting.
I want to thank you for your understanding. I've been most frustrated that personal situations have made it virtually impossible to even contemplate writing a post. I'm truly sorry I've been very much lacking in interacting with other blogs. If the truth be known, I'm embarrassed to have the comments section switched on considering my lack of being proactive.
If it wasn't for the company and supportive advice of Penny the Jack Russell dog and modest internet superstar, I may just have stayed under the duvet instead of noticing that the door is ajar.
Thank you, Penny and thank you, my friend on the other side of my computer screen.