You can sure tell it's spring time in Britain. Out front of my home was an ice cream van. Luckily, when I took this photo, Mr. Ice Cream man had turned off his ear piercing musical tune. Every year it's the same bloody song. If I hear 'Popeye the sailor man', one more time, I shall rush out the house and shove a can of spinach up his great fat ass! After doing that, I will then proceed to place him under the soft ice cream machine, cover him with great globs of creamy goo, sprinkle the dude with chocolate flakes, nuts and strawberry syrup. And to complete his new look, I shall stick a cone on his head. Change the tune man, change the tune.
Anyway, I bet you would now like an ice cream and the 'great globs of creamy goo' was indeed a reference to soft ice cream. However, the above paragraph has dick all to do with the topic of this posting, which will, once again, be a waste of your time to read.
This time of the year the 'wee folks' and their friends are usually out in my garden, playing about and rejoicing in the wonders of spring. Imagine my surprise when I wandered into my living room and noticed our little monkey buddy with a rather shocked looking garden gnome. It may indeed be a case of spunky monkey making funky frolic on garden gnome's gleeful genitals.
And then I noticed the rabbit with a garden gnome appearing to be inspecting the rabbit's rectum. At least I think it's a rabbit. Or am I just splitting 'hares'?
Oh my, the garden gnomes are taking turns. Note the sheer delight as our wee gnome pal attempts to shove his hooter into the rabbit or hare's hair, which, I guess isn't really hare, I mean hair, but fur, or maybe it's also called hair on a rabbit, or a hare, as well as fur and I suddenly realise that I'm doing a run-on sentence and thus I shall stop hare, I mean hear, because I don't mean to rabbit on.....
So, what's this then? Could it be Teagan the best gnome from Fidelina's and Geoffrey's wedding, with Fidelina's sister bridesmaid, Venetia? There had been rumours of the two of them having a bit of romantic feelings for each other. 'Teagan buddy, say something! Venetia, speak to me.....ummmm..maybe not!'
And there you have it. It was late at night. Outside I could hear the gentle breeze swaying through the budding leaves. I heard the distant call of the night owl and the haunting sound of a wayward fox. Inside, the wee folks, a funky spunky monkey, a randy rabbit, or is it a horny hare, were having uninhibited, unabashed and kinky sex. Gosh and wow. Just when I thought my life was boring, I witnessed the wonders of the wee folks and their frolicking friends. And now, my dear friend, I share these photos with you.
Sorry mum, I know this photo is rather blurry. It's a photo of a photo and I don't have one of those fancy scanner things. See mum, all those years of scribbling notes have paid off. Note what really neat stuff I write like the wee folks and friends having a wild orgy in my living room. See you in May. Love Gary xx