I have lots of parties to choose from. Here are a few that I've noted. There's the 'Labour Party'. Apparently, it's a bunch of folks who like to get together in the maternity ward of the local hospital and talk about the merits of hard work. Then there's the 'Conservative Party'. I'm not so sure I would want to go to a party where everyone wears stuffy clothing and are very reluctant to have a bit of a laugh. Another alternative might be to check out the 'Liberal Democrat Party'. Now that might be fun because at that party they evidently have a very generous host who believes in social equality. I've also heard mention of the 'UKIP' Party'. Now that sounds like a very boring time. I have lived in Britain long enough to know that 'kip' means sleep.
There is a long list of parties on offer. Here are just two more. 'The Raving Monster Loony Party' Ah yes, now that's more like it. 'The BNP Party'. 'BNP', from what I gather, means, 'Bigoted Nonsense Party'. That is one party I will most definitely not be attending.
Fair enough, the above paragraph was kind of silly bordering on the ridiculous. So I might as well continue. There is indeed going to be a 'General Election' in Britain on the 6th of May. When I tell you 'General' I do not mean that we are voting for a General. So all the different parties are trying to convince me to vote for them. During the election campaign I have heard various words and phrases that have left me confused and bewildered. In Britain they have 'Shadow Cabinets and Ministers'. People can be referred to as, 'floating voters'. I'm a bit, 'up in the air', in regards to what that means. I've even heard the expression, 'hung parliament'. I then got to thinking if you have a hung parliament, can you have a 'well-hung' parliament? The tabloids could have a field day with that one.
I have been duly informed that within the 'Houses of Parliament', they have a bit of situation that involves a 'Black Rod', a 'Chief Whip' and a 'Woolsack'. In fact, the Black Rod is handled by the 'Gentleman Usher of the Black Rod'. Hey, whatever!
The current British Prime Minister, Gordon Brown, (so legendary that the rock band, 'The Stranglers', did a song about him), waits anxiously for the outcome of the General Election on the 6th of May. Yes, it's party time in Britain. I wonder what the floating voters think about a hung parliament?
Even the 'wee folks' seem to be caught up in all this talk about parties. They asked if I would post back up the photograph of them and their party. 'The Wee Folks Party'. Hey, they have my vote.
Oh goody... The first to comment. I don't know much about the Hung Parliment Party but it seems like they might enjoy a good lynching. Ho ho. Get it? Hanging? Rope?
ReplyDeleteEh, I tried. And then, after I was tried, I was hung for "reason". Oh ha ho. Anyway, the Wee Folks Party has my vote. American votes count over there in Britain, don't they?
Take care, Gary.
Hi Kelly,
ReplyDeleteWelcome to the weird and wacky world of British politics.
I cannot believe I'm still awake. Almost 4:00 A.M. and I'm listening the Vancouver Canucks whilst typing this comment.
I was hoping someone might come up with that other interpretation of 'hung'. So glad you came up with it. Hang in there, buddy. So what else is 'noose'?
I reckon the 'Wee Folks Party' could sort you guys out. Of course, you could come over here and vote for the 'wee folks'.
Take care, Kelly :-)
I tried and succeeded with my fancy wordplay. What else is noose? Oooohh, what a groaner (rolling my eyes).
ReplyDelete4 A.M. there? It's about midnight here. Sounds about right.
Dear Gary,
ReplyDelete"Gordon Brown, texture like sun, through the ages with my mind he runs..." Did you know that song was really about heroin, and lead singer Hugh Corrnwells's addiction to said substance? But enough trivia!
Well Gary, awake again and "partying" with the wee people. Did you know that sleep deprivation can cause mild psychosis?
Anyway, I'm sure one day a "party" will come along that will have integrity, tell the truth and solve all our societal ills. But maybe I'm a little deluded myself.
Indeed, have just watched a programme on channel four which suggetsed that the British public has already been sold a major lemon even before the election, in that most of the major parties have promised no major cuts to "front line" services, i.e our beloved NHS et al, despite the recession. The programme showed that most major economists think this to be a straight forward lie. The party elected to power may well, then, not onbly find itself in a "hung" parliament, but also without, and here's another confusing word for you, a "mandate" to rule. If you wish to know, "mandate" simply means "authority to rule" and does not refer to two gentlemen of the same sex going out together.
Anyhoo, I have come to the conclusion, in my slightly addled mind, that only good people, like you and me, suffer from insomnia and mental ill health. So at least that's something!
Yours, wishing very much that the "wee people party" stands at the next general election,
David.
Dear Gary,
ReplyDeleteWe do not have as much confusion about the various Parties in the States but we make up for that in dissension. Is that a wee cup of tea I see in the photo? Both my in-laws were born and raised just outside of London and continued their tea ceremony each day at 4:00 until they passed on.
Very witty post!
Hi Gary,
ReplyDeleteI wasn't sure whether to laugh or cry while reading your article. On the one hand it was a 'labour of love' to understand. On the other hand (besides a thumb and four fingers) was my hung-self, nipless in seatle.
In my home we're just a wind of change, blowing everyone. We're raving, rocking, and maintaining our own loonies, as well. There's no better sweet sensation, as living in obamanation. True to the 'red, white and blue... we grab our ankles every morning, so they can run up the flag!
I'd write more but I have to go vote today. Hey, say 'hello' to the general.
Happy voting! Dixie xx
Hi Gary,
ReplyDeleteI prefer the look of your party to the ones offered by those sent out to knock on doors and round up anyone they can get their hands on... hugs..
Hi Gary: I think you have wrung every single drop of humour out of the UK election.
ReplyDeleteOne thing I am thankful for is the fact that it's all over in five weeks. I don't know about Canada but in the US it goes on for years and then starts again almost imediately!
When I was in Vancouver everything was 'Stanley Cup' 'Canouks' and Wayne Gretzsky or some such!
I was a candidate once you know.
ReplyDeleteBut sadly, before the election came around 'certain things' were brought to light by the press, bless their little cotton socks!
I was in one of those categories which, apparently, preclude one from standing.
What has the world come to Gary, if we can't have a little fun on the side?
Hey Kelly,
ReplyDeleteYour word plays are fancy enough for me. No 'noose' is good 'noose'...
Yeah, like a total idiot, I stayed up to listen to the Canucks lose to Chicago Blackhawks. Great stuff for Blackhawks fans :-(
Dear David,
ReplyDeleteI did indeed know what that song was about. Wonder how many folks searched the internet for 'Stranglers, Gordon Brown' and ended up with, 'do you mean 'Golden Brown'.
David, I have been informed that as you get older you need less sleep. Which means, I probably would be overdoing it if I had more than an hour's sleep. Then again, maybe I'm suffering from a mild form of psychosis and have visions of partying with the 'wee folks'.
What you mention about the Channel 4 show does not surprise me.
Of course, I do know the meaning of the various weird jargon used within our parliamentary system. I'm liking your 'mandate' definition. Very clever, David.
Right then, I'm off to the 'House Of Lords' to experience some 'Peer' pressure.
The 'Wee Folks Party', will not only possibly 'stand' at the next election, indeed, they may 'fly' at the next election. A bit of competition for the 'floating voters'.
All the best, Gary
Dear Cher,
ReplyDeleteOf course, in America, you basically have a choice of two parties.
Canada, which has a parliamentary system that is basically the same as Britain's, also has loads of parties to choose from. This can cause the possibility of a minority government or as they call it in Britain, a 'hung' parliament. I have known Canada's 'third' party, the NDP, to have the 'balance of power. Sorry, I'm rambling...
Yes, that is a wee 'cuppa' that our little friends are enjoying in the photo. 'Tea', rather confusingly to a tourist, can actually be bit a light meal.
Thank you kindly, Cher. With respect, Gary
Dear Dixie,
ReplyDeleteWhat a funny response. I love it. You have grabbed the spirit of this posting and given it a right good squeeze.
In General, I'd say that I think it would be great if the 'wee folks' went campaigning over there in anticipation of your next presidential election. Ah, I can see it now, a garden gnome for president.
"obamanation" lol !
Right then, I'm getting ready to go to the 'polling station'.
Thanks Dixie. Warm wishes, your way, Gary xx
Hi Carole,
ReplyDeleteFor sure. You wouldn't get the 'wee folks' knocking at your door. I mean, if they did, could you actually hear them :-)
Thanks Carole, Hugs, your way, Gary x
Hi bazza,
ReplyDeleteThanks for that. I'm am most appreciative of what you, 'the right honourable gentleman', has noted.
The Canadian system is virtually the same as the one here. Back when, 'George Dubbya Bush', got 'elected' the first time; Canada had a 'Federal Election, just after the Americans were still going over the electoral vote. The Canadian election was decided on the night. The Americans were still waiting for the result to find out who was going to be President. The Canadian election campaign lasts about as long as it does here.
The Stanley Cup play-offs are on right now. Ice hockey is, as you gathered, hugely popular in Canada. Wayne Gretzky is a Canadian sporting legend.
Thanks bazza. With respect, Gary
Hello Tom,
ReplyDeleteSo Tom, you have been 'knighted'. Perhaps you could enlighten us and tell us why the Queen bestowed such recognition upon you.
You were a candidate. Well done. Good to know that the ideals of 'Screaming Lord Sutch' are being upheld by you.
You go have some fun. Toodle pip, old chap.
Kind regards, klahanie aka Gary...
Gary, old thing, I was knighted by Groucho Marx, son of Karl.
ReplyDeleteSee bazza's comments for 24th April (Dunmow Flitch).
Tom,
ReplyDelete"One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got into my pajamas I'll never know."
Whilst tapping you firmly with a big sword..I was wondering if Groucho quoted you some of his witty remarks.
Good knight, Tom....
Thank you for your wry look at the situation.
ReplyDeleteI may vote later today....but I no longer assume I know what each party stands for.
What will be will be, as they say!
Very witty post..enjoyed it. I would vote for the Wee Folks Party if they were standing...maybe next year??
ReplyDeleteHi Bob,
ReplyDeleteThank you for leaving a comment.
I have no idea what each parties' election 'platform' is. I didn't even realise they had to wear high-heeled shoes.
With respect, Gary
Hi Joy Heather,
ReplyDeleteThanks for that.
I'm going to try and have a chat with the 'wee folks'. I think it would be an excellent idea for the wee folks to 'stand' at the next election. Perhaps they could start by sorting out my local council:-)
Kind wishes, Gary.
YAY!!!
ReplyDeleteI LOVE the gnomes!!
I have a situation... Apparently I need to acquire some of these so I can quit coveting yours damnit!
I want to go to the 'Looney' party with you!!! I think we could rock that shit, hard core!
I heard the election results on the news yesterday. WOW!
ReplyDeleteGreat post!
Cheers, JJ
Hey Ashley,
ReplyDeleteAnd the gnomes love you. The 'wee folks' tell me that they have some magical friends over in America who would love to stay at your place and have a right good party.
Speaking of parties...'The Raving Monster Loony Party', reckon it would be awesome if you came over here and rocked their house down! They promise not to 'pass wind' in your presence :-)
Thanks Ashley and take very good care.
Respect and stuff, Gary
Hi JJ,
ReplyDeleteThank you for commenting. I have noted your excellent blog and it is indeed a good read.
And the election results result in a 'hung parliament'. Which apparently means that no party here has a majority. Very strange goings on in the political farce that is the electoral system here.
With respect, Gary.
Oh, you must persuade the 'wee folks' to stand, Gary. I'd vote for them.
ReplyDeleteXX
Hi Suzanne,
ReplyDeleteFor sure. It would be great for this nation if the 'wee folks' 'stood', or in the case of the fairies, 'flew' for election.
Maybe, if they had too, the could form a coalition Government, with 'The Raving Monster Loony Party'. Now, that would sort out the farce that is politics in Britain. Thanks Suzanne,
Kind wishes, Gary x
hi my friend,
ReplyDeleteI'm heafy, I've added you as friend in blogcatalog. first time to be here, I like your blog. and your words are simple and honest. I really enjoy your site..
Hi friend,
ReplyDeleteThank you for those kind words. I have done likewise on 'BC'.
With respect, Gary