Saturday, 28 August 2010

Positive Energy Saboteurs.

Being positive can be bloody hard work.  Yet the alternative is a place I try to avoid.  Oh I can find loads of reasons to be miserable, angry, resentful, envious and bitter towards those who seem to have everything going their way.  What good would that do?  Well no good comes from living life expecting every situation to become some, 'I told you so', negative inevitability.
I have encountered folks who will not grasp the concept that I want to live a happy and positive life.  They live their lives waiting, with great negative anticipation, the next terrible situation to enter their persecuted world.  If you don't drop everything you're doing and tend to their emotional needs, then you are, 'just like all the rest', indeed,  you've 'betrayed' them.
Now then, if they took action, made that phone call or visited someone, they might just find they're enjoying themselves.  Well, they're having none of that.  That's because they actually relish being mired in self-pity and they will be damned if someone else has the audacity to immerse themselves in positive energy.
These people are exhausting.  I have been kind, caring and supportive, yet instead of being grateful, they lay guilt trips on me because I haven't done enough.  Thus, like so many others, I distance myself from them.  This is what they want.  The need to be 'right' that the whole world is out to get them.  Nobody else has problems or concerns as bad as them.
Well, I will not let these positive energy saboteurs drain away my right to a peaceful and happy life.  I have distanced myself from such negative forces because I choose to become even stronger.  I've done what I can and I feel no guilt.  Now this might seem inappropriate and I apologise if you find the following offensive.  To all those positive energy saboteurs, I did what I could to be there for you, yet you dismissed me as just another nasty person with a hidden agenda.  Well, I say to them, 'fuck off'.
In my own ongoing pursuit of maintaining positive distractions, I took a few more photographs.  So, here you are and I hope you like them.  Thanks.

The above photograph is a view of Leek.  The tall building in the centre is called 'Waterloo Mill' and used to be a silk mill.  It has been converted to a block of apartment suites.  In the background is a part of the cliff formation know as 'The Roaches'.

Here is a view of a Roman Catholic church is Leek named, 'St. Mary's'.

This beautiful church in Leek is named 'St. Edward's' and is a popular gathering spot for people to observe the 'double sunset' that occurs here on the Summer solstice.

Another panoramic view of Leek and the surrounding and inspiring countryside.

Here's another shot that you can click on and fill up your computer screen .

And finally, another view of St. Mary's church with the haunting moorlands as a backdrop.  Thanks again for reading this posting and taking the time to view these photographs.  May you continue to embrace positivity.  With respect and kindness, your friend, Gary.


  1. hi mr gary! wow those picture sure are pretty. i like that first on best. its like a postcard. where you live is really nice to see. im glad your getting away from those whatever you call them people so you could be more happy in your life. my brother said to always remember that people like that could maybe need help and not to be a judger or be mad at them but just do whats good for you and if staying away keeps you happy then thats what you gotta do. thanks for the cool pictures. some day maybe im gonna see where you live for real.
    ...smiles from lenny

  2. Hi Gary. I love that opening sentence: 'Being positive can be bloody hard work'!
    In my experience the people one comes across in life who are full of negativity are best avoided completely. Of course, that's not always possible especially if they are family!
    On another note Leek looks like a good place to be.
    Have a great weekend, Bazza.

  3. Dear Gary,
    I love the new photos. Leek looks truly spledid in them.
    As to your other remarks, I suppose it is very difficult to be around people who are so full of negativity. I think, though, that one has to be careful about, as Lenny says, judging people who are perhaps ill. Depression is often taken as a "self-indulgent" illness, but for those in the throes of it it certainly doesn't seem that way. I know, when I was ill, though, that people could not be around me. Even my Mum avoided me. So I agree, to some extent, that it is up to those who are ill to at least try to meet those who are trying to help half-way.
    I know you have had a difficult time of it lately, Gary, and I know you always try your best to help others, so I understand your frustration at all this negativity when you yourself are just trying to live as peaceful and happy a life as you can.
    Yours with All the Very Best,
    P.S. Does all this sound a little bit preachy? If it does, please feel free to tell me to "fuck off"!

  4. Those photographs are beautiful, a real sense of place, you have a gift, a 'painter's eye'.

  5. Gary, my friend I completely am with you about distancing yourself from 'positive energy saboteurs'. I've been around these people, all too often that it's easy to spot them by their rays of 'darkness'.

    I'm not saying that people have to be happy all the freaking time, but there's a difference between having some bad times, and needing to share it with another person for the sake of sharing, and getting good advice - but if it's meant to pull the other person down down down and drain the other off their positiveness, then like you said, they might as well go eff themselves.

    I love the pictures!They're so beautiful, I feel transported to Leek in an instant. Hehe.

    Have a beautiful day, Gare. I really appreciated this post. It's giving my strong positive vibes.

    Peaceful wishes your way,

  6. The photos are so beautiful that I ache to be there. Oh, one day. As for those people you speak of, I've had a few in my life. I'm learning to avoid them like the plague.

    Great post, Gary.

  7. Do you know Gary that I suffered with depression once. I went to the doctor and said "Doc, I think the whole world hates me!"
    Do you know what he replied?
    He said "Don't be stupid Tom - most of them don't even know you".
    Chin up old boy!

  8. These photographs of your hometown are quite good. It is a lovely part England.
    Distance yourself without regret from the "Emotional Vampires"out there. They can never be filled or allow others to live a positive life if possible.

  9. Hi Gary,

    I clicked on the photo and it really did fill up my computer screen which couldn't help but trigger a big cheese eating smile. I think I'd like Leek. I also like the soundbite positive energy saboteur (PES). I highly recommend a negative ion boost to counteract the side effects of PES. Waterfalls, oceans, mountain air, sun and barefoot walks are excellent sources-yes, we all have our ways. Enjoy your weekend Gary.

  10. Hi Lenny,
    I'm really pleased you like the photos. It is so nice to get out and about and marvel at the beauty all around.
    Your brother is right. We should never pass judgement on others. This posting was actually my way of hoping someone who is always negative can see that there are alternatives and you should never give up.
    In life, we need to learn to take care of ourselves. Sometimes, no matter what you do to help some people; it is very much up to them to learn there other ways to approach life. Thank you, Lenny.
    Big smile to you, Gary :-)

  11. Hi bazza,
    I have had to distance myself from negative people who were draining me of my energy. No matter what I said or did it was conveniently dismissed as if I had not been supportive at all. Very perplexing behaviour.
    Leek, the 'Queen of the Moorlands' is a pretty nice to live. You have a great weekend, also.
    Kind wishes, Gary.

  12. Dear David,
    I'm glad you liked the photos. Leek does look like a very nice place in them...
    David, you know me well enough to know that I do not pass judgement. I have been involved with mental health Organisations for many years and realise the debilitating nature of depression.
    Mine is a reference to folks who I have been very supportive of through sincere caring and empathy. What I really could not take any more were the lies that I have experienced. For instance, one person I went to a lot of effort to visit and make phone calls to make sure they were okay. This person, to maintain their negative outlook, proceeded to inform people, via a social network, that they never get visits or phone calls. Illness is one thing, the lies were something I could no longer tolerate. If someone wants to dismiss my good intentions as non-existent, than so be it. I have my life to live.
    I hope I explained this okay. And David, you are not 'preachy', despite your own issues, you are trying your best. However, what the heck, 'fuck off'.
    Take good care and I will see you on Sunday.

  13. Hi Carole,
    Wow. Thanks for that. I am really enjoying going out and taking photographs. A most positive distraction. I hope you have a wonderful weekend.
    With kindness and respect, Gary x

  14. Hi Shanaz,
    Thank you for your nice comment. I knew this posting might cause a bit of debate.
    You understand where I am coming from on this. You can only do so much. Of course, we all have our bad times. It's how we handle them. I just got so tired of people who were determined to be always negative about everything and everybody.
    I know you are there to help a friend in need. When it reaches the point your good intentions are devalued, then it is time to distance one's self and think about our own health.
    So pleased you like the photos. I reckon if you were ever in Leek, there would be, no doubt, a parade in your honour:-)
    Thank you, Shanaz.
    Have a most happy weekend. In peace Gary:-)

  15. Hi Joylene,
    Glad you like the photographs. This is a beautiful part of the world. Quite different from where you live which is also very beautiful.
    People who insist on being negative, no matter how positive you are to them, are best to be left alone. I'm not very well and the negative influences were making me worse. The distancing from them is my self-preservation.
    Thank you Joylene and have a lovely weekend.
    With much respect, Gary.

  16. Greetings Sir Tom Eagerly,
    You, good sir, have perfectly summed it up.
    I have noted that some very negative folks seem to think that everyone is out to get them. They give themselves far too much credit.
    Great comment, Sir Tom. Have yourself a merry little weekend.
    Kind wishes, Gary.

  17. Hi Count Sneaky,
    It is actually not my home town. It is just another place I have settled into during my own ongoing life adventure. It is a lovely location in England.
    Before I posted this up I did a bit of research. 'Emotional vampires' was one of the phrases I came upon and is very apt. They will never drain away our positive 'blood'.
    Take very good care of yourself and your loved ones.
    With great respect, Gary.

  18. Hi THE SNEE,
    Nothing quite like a big cheesy smile:-) You Gouda been smiling. I've never recovered from the fact that cottage cheese is apparently not made out of a cottage. So just what have I learnt about cheese? Well, eating Stilton cheese will not make me seem taller. That eating blue cheese will not make me sad. That is not the law in Philadelphia that you must eat Philadelphia cream cheese.
    Sorry, that surreal rambling above was my of immersing myself in some more positive energy or curdled cheese. Yuck lol
    Did I ever mention that I moved to Leek because I always wanted to live in a town named after an onion? I did? Oh....cheese and onion....
    Seriously, I love your suggestions to ward off the side-effects of 'PES'. It seems to work for you and it works for me. Right then, I'm going for a stroll with my good friend and positive companion, 'Penny', the Jack Russell dawg...'Come on Penny' 'Arf, arf!'
    Have a great weekend.
    Peaceful and positive wishes, your way, Gary :-)

  19. Its a great post.i will definitely share it with my friends.

    work from home

  20. Hey Stela,
    Call me a cynic, but I get the impression you don't give a crap about my blog. Please tell me why this is such a great post and you will share it with your friends?
    I've decided to leave your comment, this time. If you are genuine and not, heaven forbid, another self-promoting blogger; please respond back and tell me it aint so. Your time, starts now..tick, tock...

  21. Doug "Cheeseman" Stephens30 August 2010 at 22:28

    This is a great post. I am NOT going to share it with my friends because I am greedy and am keeping it to myself. Also I have no friends. I am sure there is no correlation between those two facts.

    Those are nice pics, by the way. They evoke a feeling of peacefulness.

  22. Hi Doug,
    Did I ever mention to you that 'I Like Cheese'? I did. Oh.
    I believe you have a friend in Scotland. I know Scotland aint exactly Texas, but what the heck eh.
    Thank you for liking my photos, Doug. In peace and understanding, Gary.

  23. Beautiful photos, Gary! Years ago there was a book and toxic people versus nurturing people and in it they suggested we do exactly what you have done. In order to stay healthy, be need to rid ourselves of toxins. We think of that when it comes to food, but it also applies to our emotional well-being. Kudos to you for making the right choices.

  24. Leek in Staffordshire?

    Your rant about negative draining people is great. These are people firmly embedded in poor-me paranoia and co-dependency. It is always some external force to blame for their current misery and no matter what others do for them, as you say it is never enough.
    The greatest expression of adult love is to allow another person to face their reality. letting go is an act of love. Glad to see you did just that!
    Smiles and blessings

  25. Dear Cher,
    Thank you for liking the photographs.
    Your words are wise and I am so pleased you understood what I was trying to convey in this posting.
    Removing the 'toxins', not only in relation to food, but those that are detrimental to our well being. What an excellent way of looking at it.
    With respect and kudos back to you, Gary.

  26. Dear Juliana,
    Yes indeed, Leek, Staffordshire, 'The Queen of the Moorlands'.
    You have summed up, rather profoundly, what I was trying to say. Indeed, this posting was an act of love, caring and compassion. Those who would immerse themselves in negativity really need to take responsibility for their lives. It is up to us to make the changes and your words ring so very true.
    I have had a quick read of your blog and it is beautifully written. Thank you for you comment. It is most appreciated.
    In peace and respect, Gary.


I do try to comment back to each commenter individually. However, I might have to shorten my replies or give a group thank you. That way, I can spend more time commenting on your blogs. Thank you and peace, my friend.