Tuesday, 3 March 2015

Irritable Blog Syndrome.

I've got loads of blog postings still lurking around in my draft section.  One sentence there and a partial sentence somewhere else.  I think the only finished draft is the one blowing in the echoing cavern between my ears.

I've been feeling exhausted for several months now.  So much so that I'm struggling to even formulate this blog post.  Even with what I thought would perk me up with the acquisition of a new computer that actually works, has made little difference.

A lot changed at the beginning of August, 2014.  A new home and a new reality.  A new home without my son who is now getting on with his life in his first own home.  So much upheaval. So many extreme variations of emotion to contend with.  If it wasn't for the sharing of both our homes with our beloved dog, Penny, I would be crying and hiding away under my duvet cover.

I'm finding it difficult to cope with.  I reflect in my house without anybody to share directly the mixed sadness and hope that "empty nest syndrome" has cast upon every fibre of being.  If it wasn't for the lifelines of my friends and family via phone chats, I'm not sure I could have been able to take it.  The lifelines have been a vital support in my ability to move on from this.  My gratitude can not be measured in mere words.

On March 10, I have an appointment with my doctor.  Day after day, I can barely get out of bed.  Day after day of having flu-like symptoms.  I think I may have chronic fatigue syndrome.  This has left me frustrated and flustered that I've been so much in the background within the blogging world.  I hope that with the doctor's help, I can get back on track.  Feeling like this and being all alone in my three dimensional reality has left me wondering if I can ever get the momentum back.

Although many have told me they understand about my absence and my lack of commenting, I, nonetheless, feel terribly guilty.  Guilt, an unneeded emotion that I must not let fill me with negative energy.

As for the title of this post, "Irritable Blog Syndrome", that's just me being satirical.   If I can regain the satire, the tongue-in-cheek and the irony of my writing, then I know I'm on my way back.

Because of the relentless exhaustion, I'm switching the comments off on this post.  I would rather attempt to have a go at commenting on other sites.  I hope you understand.

Thank you for your time.