Monday, 22 July 2013

WARNING! Coming Soon To A Computer Screen Near You!

Blog hop this and blog hop that
I've even heard of a rhyming cat
Blogfests are all over the place
Gather followers in cyberspace
A blog hop should be for a bunny
So many of them it just aint funny
A blogfest you might of guessed
Is nothing more than promoting jest.
There's some kind "Anti-Blogfest" starting to circulate out in Blogland or Blogsville, or whatever the heck it's called.  The title of the anti-blogfest is the, "Anti-Blogfest Gary Fest".  And hey, and yay, it even has hosts. You know you've made the big times when you have hosts involved.  According to my sources, which are several, including a Jack Russell dog, a bewildered hedgehog and a collection of wee folks, this here anti-blogfest was the brainchild of "Mazza" aka Mark "Mad Maaaan" Koopmans.  Have you ever noticed those obsessed with blog hops and blog fests and blog parties and alphabet challenges, use the word "brainchild" to note the blogger that started the whole kit and kaboodle?  The nifty neato button above was designed by Morgan.  Thank you, Morgan.  Thank you all so much.  As Sally Field once uttered, "I haven't had an orthodox career and I've wanted more than anything to have your respect.  The first time I didn't feel it, but this time I feel it--and I can't deny the fact that you like me, right now, you like me!"
Here are the list of hosts!






"The rules are *very* simple."   Rules?  What?

"Create the titles of three PG-13 rated blogfests you would never join and then add a descriptive sentence or two.  That's it!"

For examples to inspire you in the amazing anti-blogfest, it's probably best you go check out the links to the hosts above.  If you are one of the hosts in the links above, you already know what your examples are.

Hey and thanks for the irony!   

102 comments:

  1. Yes I am going to have a Seaside Blogfest where everyone has to look at the side of the monitor and thus make it impossible to join in.

    See Side . . . . .HAH HAHAH HHAHAH HHAH HAH HAH HAH HA HAH AH HA HH AH AH AH

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Rob,

      I shall sea you beside the seaside and sea what we can't sea and that's for shore.

      See side of monitor for non-instructions! :)

      Gary

      Delete
  2. Wow, and you're even promoting the blogfest which makes fun of blogfests which is your pet peeve so we did it to honor you...and the levels of irony here are just mind-boggling...
    Tina @ Life is Good

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Tina,

      You know I did this as a way of saying thanks to your irony. And a way of hopefully getting you guys more recognition and loads more followers. The mind 'bloggles'. Geddit? :)

      Gary

      Delete
  3. Blog-hops and blog-fests. I never understood what they mean but joining an antiblogfest sounds like a good idea.
    Hugs to Penny the internet star.

    Julie

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Julia,

      Ah yes, blog hops, blogfests, blog parties, alphabet challenges and the lot are evidently a way of bringing forth positive interaction. The cynical me might say that those who set them up may well be blatantly self-promoting themselves and trying to accumulate followers. Well, that's what the cynical me might say.

      The irony of an anti-blogfest is not new. I already did a suggestions post about it months ago. Thank you, Julia.

      I shall now go hug Penny.

      Gary :)

      Delete
  4. OMG I AM DYING LAUGHING!!! LOVE THIS!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Caren,

      Don't you just love the irony! All those important bloggers have decided how much they care about shy, humble and oh so unassuming me! :)

      Seriously, I hope you're feeling better and darn it, keep smiling.

      Gary :)

      Delete
  5. Gary, you're promoting a blogfest? Granted it's your own...
    Knew you would get a kick out of it. When Mark suggested it, I said YES!!! It will put a smile on Gary's face.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Alex,

      Am I? Oops! I don't mind promoting an anti-blogfest. Anything thing with my mug on it is bound to get my attention. That Mark is a bit of a character. Must be that Hawaiian air. I'm smiling, alright, through gritted teeth, I'm smiling. Be well, ninja Captain or whatever your starstruck fans call you.

      Your dumbstruck fan,

      Gary

      Delete
  6. Anti-blogfest. Yippee! I'm having some trouble at my blog today - must be some bad vibes since I missed an important challenge - but I'll check this out.

    Gary, I needed your soothing ocean blog header today.

    .......dhole

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Donna,

      I hate blogfests! I hope your situation is better now, Donna. Challenges can wait. You need some chill out time and look after YOU! :)

      Immerse yourself in the soothing ocean ambience, dear lady.

      Gary :)

      Delete
  7. This was one I just couldn't pass up...muahahaha!!

    Was that over the top??? :D

    Should be fun!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Mark,

      This is one I'd like to throw up over! :)

      Good sir, you are never over the top.

      Should be a blast. I'd love to give it a blast!

      Gary :)

      Delete
  8. Have faith, Gary, that this will be the anti-blogfest to end all blogfests. And it's all because we love you. But I didn't have anything to do with it. Thanks for believing in my innocence. If I'm ever on trial, I want you in the jury.

    xoRobyn

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Robyn,

      Did you say to end all blogfests? Ah yes you did! :) With a little luck, this will end those silly blogfests, once and for all. Gosh, I can feel the love. Of course, you, dear lady, are the epitome of innocence! :) I shall be running the kangaroo court. Blog hop to it. The court is now in session.

      Gary :) x

      Delete
  9. Hi Gary - I don't think anyone likes me - I have no friends .. oh dear ... I signed up ... must garner me some anti-friends ...

    Did Mark snog you above your lips? 'over the top'??

    We have rain and thunder .. portending a great August ..

    Isn't August 12th the start of some shooting? It is ..the Glorious Twelfth ... don't think that will give you much pleasure but the grouse are sure good to eat! While the 12th is the middle of the Perseid meteor shower ..

    I'd better get back to babies! Cheers from a rain disappeared south coast! Didn't last long .. short and sweet - Hilary

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Hilary,

      Everybody loves Hilary. I think they should have a blogfest in your honour. Good that you signed up. You might just interact with a whole bunch of nifty neato anti-friends :)

      Mark is one of my not so secret admirers.

      We had some portending. Thunder, lightning and a certain Jack Russell who piddled on the carpet.

      August 12 is my step-dad's birthday. The only shooting I want to know about is the shooting stars.

      The babies are calling you. The rain was torrential and the street out front, looked like a river. An hour later, back to dry weather.

      Be well, Hilary.

      Gary

      Delete
  10. Hello!

    My name's Tammy and I'm the Marketing Coordinator at TheUncommonDog.com. I found your blog through Blog Paws and thought you might be interested in seeing a fun and engaging infographic we've created that focuses on dog safety during the hot summer months: http://www.theuncommondog.com/Images/infographics/dog-days-summer.jpg

    If you like the infographic and want to share it with your readers please feel free to do so. The only thing we ask in return is that you link back to TheUncommonDog.com in someway from your post.

    Also, definitely let me know if you do decide to post it because we'd be happy to spread the word about your blog by linking to your post from our Facebook page.

    Big Tail Wag!
    Tammy Sexton
    Marketing Coordinator
    tammy@theuncommondog.com
    www.theuncommondog.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Tammy,

      I have just checked your photo and yes, at a later date, Penny the Jack Russell dog and modest internet superstar has informed me she would gladly doing a pawsting about your notable work, complete with a link back to you.

      I shall let you know when Penny is ready. She is having a well deserved nap, but should be able to do a feature of you within the next two weeks.

      All the best and thank you.

      Penny's alleged human,

      Gary :)

      Delete
  11. LOL.... this is going to be the coolest blog fest/hop ever.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Terry,

      It will be well cool. Hopefully, the anti-blogfest will end the blogfest madness! :)

      Gary :)

      Delete
  12. LOL! The anti-blogfest disguised as a blogfest! :D That button cracks me us Gary. I'll be out of town aug 12th, but I'll try to sneak in as long as I don't have to sign up for it. (;

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Elise,

      Anti-blogfest, blogfest. Somebody pinch me! Yes, the guy on the button is cracked :)

      Out of town, no doubt going on another one of your celebrity tours to thrill all your adoring fans. You not sign up for something? What? LOL

      Gary :)

      Delete
  13. Wait, does the "Thanks for the ironies" bloghop have to deal with pressing problems?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi auto de fey,

      The "press" will, no doubt, be wanting to have maximum media coverage on such a non-event. Thanks for a clever angle on this. I shall now press "publish" after ironing out a few kinks.

      Gary :)

      Delete
  14. So there it is, the Gary blogfest. It had to happen some day, hahaha. It's a busy day for me but I'll be reading what the guys come up with.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Al,

      All my worst nightmares have come to fruition! :) Can I take it? I can always ignore it. Hope you find some relaxation during your busy day, my friend.

      Gary :)

      Delete
  15. We really really like you! This blogfest will be fun.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Diane,

      I think I'm turning into "The Flying Nun", or is it "Gidget..

      Help!

      Gary :)

      Delete
  16. Oh Gary, a fest n' hop in your honor is just the ultimate in "gotcha". So should I participate in your honor or be a conscientious objector in your honor? What's a girl to do?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Julie Luek,

      Ah yes, an anti-blogfest in my honour, or "honor". Apologies to my proper English spell check. I've not been got. This way those participating can increase awareness of themselves and accumulate followers. As for me, I shall discreetly stay in the background and sob uncontrollably in a darkened room :) Go ahead, don't participate or participate or go on a campaign to destroy the alphabet challenge with me.

      Gary :)

      Delete
  17. This made me laugh out loud when I read about it on Alex's site yesterday. Too funny. :D

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Julie Flanders,

      Oh yeah. Let them have their fun. I'm sure it will be a good time for those involved :)

      Gary :)

      Delete
  18. You look very stern on that button Gary....I'm too scared to join your blogfest.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Delores,

      I think there's a slight twinkle in my eye. I had to take the photo myself. I can't seem to get anybody to take my photo. I find the whole blogfest thing very scary :)

      Gary :)

      Delete
  19. Replies
    1. Hi Debra,

      Nah, I'm just humouring them. Let the kids have some fun! :)

      Gary :)

      Delete
  20. This is the point where blogfests have really jumped the shark.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Pat,

      The shark shall bite back, go on a frenzy and stop blogfests in their tracks...

      Gary :)

      Delete
    2. Sharknado!!
      Besides, it's about time someone else had his own blogfest besides me.

      Delete
    3. Mr. Ninja Captain type dude,

      Aha, snark attack! Quite right! I think we should have a non-blogfest about non-blogfests about anti-blogfests, complete with prizes such as a glossy autographed photo of your Ninja Captain self. A blogfest celebrating me would be good. A little creepy, but what the heck....

      Delete
  21. Oh my this one made me chuckle!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Suzanne,

      Yeah and I'm having a right good chuckle! I have plans for them all. Aha!

      Gary :)

      Delete
  22. Careful, you might get sucked in to the blogfest way of life ;-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Annalisa,

      I don't think so. I'm an independent blogger :)

      Gary :)

      Delete
  23. Brilliant. Created by (some of the) people who know and love you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Sue,

      Created by my adoring fans :)

      Gary :)

      Delete
  24. This is so cool. I'm not going to be able to enter, but I can't wait to read all the entries :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Carol,

      Oh no, not participating in such a fascinating, deeply profound contest or whatever it is. Maybe I should forward my satirical pretend blogfests to them that I posted up in the past. Ahem! :)

      Gary :)

      Delete
  25. You need to smile a bit more

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi John,

      You base this on one photo? I have nobody to take my photo. I took it myself.

      Gary

      Delete
  26. I, too, am looking forward to reading the entry names. They should be quite amusing.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi JoJo,

      I've no doubt that those amazing blogging intellects will come up with some really neat ideas :)

      Gary :)

      Delete
  27. Hahaha! Oh Gary, I'm LOVING this. When Mark approached me, I knew this would be something special. I just wish I knew you long before now--I need to play catch up! (And I have yet to put up my post--I'm out of town but will be back and posting shortly!)

    I'm glad you approve of the button. I was laughing so hard when making it!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Morgan,

      Isn't this just gosh darn good fun! :) Mark approached you? Yikes! LOL! I'm delighted we are interacting and thanks for that crazy button of some guy who looks rather suspicious. I've been checking your site and I noted you haven't posting since the last time you posted. That kinda' makes sense.

      I believe you when you say you were laughing so hard when you created the button. I'd be laughing also :)

      Gary :)

      Delete
    2. I'm still laughing! It's so perfect that you're this tough dude. And your picture couldn't have been more spot on for this! :-)

      Delete
    3. Hey Morgan,

      Are you still laughing? I like that :) I'm no tough dude. Just a gosh darned lovable n'stuff dude who hangs out with magical creatures in his enchanting garden. Although, you'd be correct, that photo I took of shy, humble me, was really taken by me. Nobody in their right mind will take my photo.

      Gary :)

      Delete
  28. Next you'll be a blogfest addict

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ah yes, Pat Hatt,

      I shall be sending you a blogfest detox instruction booklet! :)

      Gary :)

      Delete
  29. Oh dear, now I'll actually have to think - I thought blogfests were all about mindless nonsense, except those about books, of course! :)

    Love the badge!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Yolanda,

      Blogfests are all about mindless nonsense, blatant self-promotion and the pursuit of accumulating followers to massage the ego. Other than that, they are fantastically awesome. Especially the ones about books, notably your books! :)

      Gary :)

      Delete
  30. Sir Gazza,

    It was a pleasure coming up with this Anti-blogfest, so much so that I shall call you Uncle Gary until the end of the Anti-blogfest :)

    Cheers, mate :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Nephew Mark,

      I'm absolutely certain you did a joyous dance, ran naked through the streets of Honolulu, got a lei, had a Luau, smoked a grass skirt, played the ukulele, surfed the big one off Diamond Head and got noticed by "Dog" the Bounty Hunter.

      Cheers, dude :)

      Gary :)

      Delete
  31. Hilarious examples over at Alex's blog. Mixing desert and cauliflower is never good. Best to Penny! She should visit because Fiona took over my blog this week!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Eve,

      Yes, those hilarious three examples are very clever. Blogfests and myself mixed together would be a surreal experience.

      Penny shall come and visit Fiona :)

      Gary :)

      Delete
  32. Well okay, this is new to me. I've been out of the blog loop for awhile!!! Gary, you are always a barrel of LOL!!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Suzanne,

      It's new to me also :) I want to get out of the blog loop. The whole thing is loopy. Lovely to see you, eh. LOL, eh! :)

      Gary :)

      Delete
  33. I've always thought you reminded me of someone, and now I realize it's The Flying Nun! Great poem, great quote, great guy, and great fest! Hooray for Gary!

    Julie

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Julie,

      I'm thrilled you could see the uncanny resemblance to me and The Flying Nun! Thanks for all the great stuff you said about me. Gosh, look at Gary go, flying through the air, wheeee.....

      Gary :)

      Delete
  34. i will consider myself warned and I am hiding under my desk!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Ray,

      Beware of low-flying anti-blogfests hovering around your desk!

      Gary :)

      Delete
  35. LOL!!!!!

    You are so funny, Mr Gary!
    You live in Leek and with the gorgeous Penny!
    I don't know where this ode is going
    I think I'll just go out and take a walking!

    Ahem! Take care
    x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well howdy Miss Kitty,

      Oops, just got stuck in an episode of "Gunsmoke"!

      Funny Miss Kitty
      With her little ditty
      Penny says hello
      What do you know
      Your ode has departed
      The doggy farted...

      Ahem and be well, y'all

      Gary :)
      x

      Delete
  36. yeah well, glad to meet you too! Away with seriousness for a moment .. enter sunshine!
    you too be peaceful and postive ... you never know what could happen ..

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Susan Scott,

      I'm delighted to meet you here. I have also read your articulate, thoughtful posting over at your superb site. I also wanted to say, once again, what a profound take you did on the "Tree of Life". Your excerpt can be found here by those who might not have read it yet,

      http://writerlysam.wordpress.com/2013/07/21/tree-of-life-branching-out-featuring-susan-scott/

      My friend, I live life with realistic, positive anticipation, rather than, negative speculation. I know this is an ethos you embrace.

      Be well, Susan and thank you.

      Gary :)

      Delete
  37. LOL. Oh, Gary, you are a blessing~! Thanks for the huge chuckles.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Joylene,

      I'm blessed to know lovely ladies such as you. I'm glad this ultimate in irony, conspired by some rather weird hosting characters, gave you some chuckles.

      Hope you are okay, Joylene.

      Gary :)

      Delete
  38. I honestly have no idea if someone has insulted you or praised you to the Small God heavens hahaha, I don't unbderstand all this blog-speak at all. Fill me in as the pasty chef said to the baker. *laughs. I think it must be a good thing? *feels somehwat dim. :P

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Michelle,

      I think it was some sort of reverse praise. I don't understand all this blog jargon either. Dough! Your baker joke had me in rolls of laughter. You are very bright. You don't get involved in all this fiasco.

      Speaking of fiasco, I very shyly sent you a message on Farcebook. Not sure if you got it.

      Gary :)

      Delete
  39. I think that I shall never see
    A blog as festive as one by thee.

    A blog whose cheery words are blessed
    By cyber bunnies seeking nests. (Sorry, Ms. Kilmer!)

    A blog that seeks throughout the day
    To lift our spirits and make us play;

    A blog that may in summer be
    Exactly what I want to see.

    If rhyming cats is your next hop
    This will be my first stop.

    And there you have it. My jest--bunnies and cats included because who can hate those? Please say nobody, so I won't be upset.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hello Lee
      It's good to see
      That a blogfest of jest
      At your behest
      Has a request
      Of bunnies galore
      To even the score
      Or perhaps it's a hare
      Neither here nor there
      A blog contest
      That is the best
      Each and every blogging day
      Makes you want to sing and play
      A blog that is winter down under
      A blog that makes you kinda' wonder
      A rhyming cat
      And all of that
      Please make it stop
      This crazy hop

      Your bunnies are funnies. Your cats are cute. Makes me think of a puss and a boot..





      Delete
  40. Hey Gary
    I feel like you do about blogfests but for you, I'll do this one. I did sign up. Ha

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hey Manzanita,

      So we wont make mention of the alphabet :) An anti-blogfest is the ultimate in irony. Glad you signed up. I guess. LOL

      Gary :)

      Delete
  41. im very excited about this nonblogfest!
    like an opposite day! and i'll be warning all about it on monday!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Tara,

      I'm real pleased your excited about an anti-blogfest! :) Kinda' like an alternate universe, me thinks.

      Thanks for informing me about a Monday warning.

      Gary :)

      Delete
  42. Berry interesting!! Gar bare I can't believe you condone the un-condonable! Love it

    Your welcome. From a star struck fan.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hey Tammy!

      Berry? What? Are you setting up a favourite (favorite) fruits blogfest? I'm only giving them the chance to get more followers! Ha ha...

      Thanks, Tammy. Your are one rock n' roll starstruck fan!

      Gary :)

      Delete
  43. I can't wait to read the entries of this anti-blogfest.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hey Medeia,

      I can wait for the entries in the anti-blogfest :) I might consider non-submitting a non-entry.

      Gary :)

      Delete
  44. You're a Rockstar. No, a Moviestar! No, a Blogstar!!!! Yay you!!! Hey now you're a Blogstar get your game on, go play!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Robin,

      Am I? Wow, thanks for that :) You think I would participate in an anti-blogfest? Folks ask me if I'm always indecisive. Well yes and no.....

      Gary :)

      Delete
  45. Very cool, Gary! Let me see if I can get settled in Georgia fast enough to participate in this anti-blog fest. It sounds fun!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Sherry,

      Oh yeah! So cool I shall go to Antarctica, just to warm up :) I wonder if you will be having a "rainy night in..."

      Gosh, the festival of fiasco shall soon commence.

      Gary :)

      Delete
  46. Clever wit you got there :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Unlocked,

      You reckon? Thanks :) There's a key to it all.

      Gary :)

      Delete
  47. I've been suffering from blog hop fatigue since A to Z but keep finding myself signing up for these danged things. And when I saw THIS ONE, I just couldn't resist. It was the irresistible force, blast it.
    ;-)

    Some Dark Romantic

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Greetings Mina,

      Speaking of fatigue, my human has gone for a nap. We both wish that the alphabet challenge shall never again darken the doors of blogland!

      Oh no, not you as well! :) My human will end up sobbing uncontrollably.

      Thank you, Mina.

      Pawsitive wishes,

      Penny the Jack Russell dog and modest internet superstar! :)

      Delete
  48. LOL! While, for some, Blogfests are Anathema. I absolutely love them. They present challenges to help me grow as a writer.

    So maybe I should suggest the Anathema-fest ;O)

    ReplyDelete
  49. The chillies and peppers appreciation fest I certainly wouldn't sign up to! ;O)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Madeleine,

      Aha, for some like me, blogfests are something I stay well away from. My challenge is to do my own thing. Always been a rebel. However, if participation in such challenges inspires your writing and growth, that's very good. I think you should have the "Anathema-fest" :)

      That sounds like a hot blog hop! :)

      Delete

I do try to comment back to each commenter individually. However, I might have to shorten my replies or give a group thank you. That way, I can spend more time commenting on your blogs. Thank you and peace, my friend.