Friday 28 December 2012

Making A Difference.

I had a very quiet Christmas Day.  Although, I did manage to have a fascinating conversation with the four walls who refused to give concrete answers.  I also discussed the meaning of life with Penny the Jack Russell dog and modest internet superstar!   Lovable son arrived in the early evening just long enough to open presents, grab his Christmas meal and proceed to his bedroom.  I have learnt that an X Box and gaming online, is a must in my young man's life.

I do have an advantage spending Christmas mostly alone.  No tolerating 'uncle Bert' who gets increasingly drunk, talks in a very loud voice about his views on politics, religion and the kids these days.  One tries to nod  their head at the right times. "Yes uncle Bert.  Ah those kids these days, eh!"  What one really wants to say to him is, "Why don't you shut the f**k up, you opinionated buffoon!"  Instead, one grins at him through gritted teeth.

'Granny Good Witch', in the meantime, continues with the theme about the kids these days, how they have no respect and are ever so rude.  At this point, Granny Good Witch makes a snarky comment about the state of the home, reaches over the table, grabs the last slice of turkey, finishes of the finest malt whiskey, lets rip with a fart that burns out nostril hairs and then falls asleep in the Christmas pudding.

Nephew Tom and niece Mary, have food fights, smash the antique grandfather clock and torment the family cat.  The night of Christmas Day ends up with a traditional family argument where uncle Bert finds out his wife, auntie Mabel, is having an affair with Bert's brother, Fred.  Fred, quickly swigs back the last drops of his home made wine and staggers out the front door.  Uncle Bert staggers after him down the street and tackles him in front of the police station.  They are both arrested and wake up on Boxing Day in a cell wondering how they got there...

Yes, I could of felt sorry about myself being mostly alone on Christmas Day.  Instead, I decided to try and make a difference.  I knew that many folks do struggle with Christmas Day and I reached out to the sad, the lonely or those who just wanted to chat, anyway.  It turned into an inspiring day and I was deeply touched by the interaction that was shared.  To direct my focus onto something positive, instead of being overwhelmed by sadness, taught me some valuable lessons.  If we do help each other, we really do help ourselves.

There are those who only look for the bad.  And thus, all they see is bad when there is goodness right in front of them.  I used to be like that.  Yet such negativity, ate me up, controlled my life.  Now I choose to see the good.  What we shared on Christmas Day was a resounding victory for the good in this world.

I looked at the warm, gentle ambience of the flickering candles.  The flickering candles, symbolic of a continued better life.  Thank you for being here and I will always be there for you.

54 comments:

  1. Well, we left all the relatives behind in Britain, so the day was a quiet family day. Glad your inspiration to reach out to folks left you feeling inspired yourself.

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    1. Hi Ian,

      Ah yes, I reckon you had a reasonably peaceful day with your family in the continuing adventure of your new lives. When we inspire others, we inspire ourselves.

      In kindness,

      Gary

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  2. Wow.....that's quite the family you described there. I think maybe a Christmas Day alone would be preferable to that mob. We had the destructo kid and his sister and his mother who tried to blend in to the wood work and leave the kid wrangling to the old folks. Maybe next year we'll meet them at a restaurant lol. Seriously Gary, you make a difference every single day....We are all the better for your continued positive presence in our lives.

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    1. Hi Delores,

      And thanks heavens that family were just an imaginary family. Although, some might relate to such relations. Oh yeah, meet the rest of the family at a restaurant or meet up in a neutral place :)

      I am grateful for your words. I firmly believe we can all be here for each other. Thank you, Delores.

      In peace and goodwill,

      Gary

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  3. I wondered how your day went helping and listening to others. Sorry the game system called to your son, but I'm sure you made a difference and were equally touched.
    Some people only see the negative. And that is very, very sad.

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    1. Hi Alex,

      The day was a long one and I took into account other time zones. I stayed up until 4:00 A.M., Boxing Day, in case those in western time zones wanted to interact. I believe I made a difference and I was touched by the interaction. It was profound and inspiring.

      Some folks are determined to only see the negative and try to sabotage others who try to maintain a positive outlook. Tis, very, very sad, indeed.

      Thank you, Alex.

      In peace and positivity, your way,

      Gary

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  4. At least you did something good on Christmas day.

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    1. Hi PT,

      I did my best. Wishing you well in your writing endeavours.

      Thank you, PT.

      With respect and kind wishes,

      Gary

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  5. I spent most of the day alone too since we have no family in the area, and Peggy worked. I enjoyed my day quite well, but Xmas alone doesn't much feel like Christmas. It simply feels like a day when few people appear to be out and about.

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    1. Hi Snowbrush,

      It can seem like loneliness enhanced on Christmas Day. It seems, despite you spending quite awhile on your own, your are okay with your own company. I'm okay with my own company, but yes, would be nice to have a bit more of a social thing going rather than being a spectator as one observes those who are out there and having a bit of a festive time.

      Take very good care and thank you.

      Good wishes, your way,

      Gary

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  6. Replies
    1. Hi bazza,

      True and yet in this case, I gave and what I received anyway, was an inspiring gift of hope from some incredibly compassionate people. I'm blessed.

      All the very best to you and your loved ones and thank you for that private message.

      With respect and kind wishes,

      Gary

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  7. Thanks for your lovely comment Gary, much appreciated. This year was the first ever Christmas alone and it did hit hard, I did phone my son in Spain but apart from that I saw and spoke to no-one else.
    I too spoke to the four walls , I am looking forward to the new year when I hope to start some new projects, I wish I could have animals where I live but pets are not allowed, When my husband was alive we had a dog and cat, The dog was around for 16 years and the cat 14 years, the cat was diabetic and needed 2 shots of insulin daily. The cat outlived my husband and she was very much missed when I had to part with her.
    Happy new year to you and Penny,'
    Yvonne.

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    1. Hi Yvonne,

      I felt compelled to leave another comment on your posting. I do understand how very difficult this Christmas has been for you. I'm glad you managed to speak to your son in Spain.

      The four walls and me have some conversations that indicate they are rather um 'board' :) Good for you for looking forward to the New Year with the ideals of positive distractions. Such a shame that you are not allowed animals where you live. For we both realise how much their unconditional love means to us. It's been such a challenging time for you, Yvonne. I just know that your future will be better. You and the support that is shared, can make that so.

      A peaceful, hopeful New Year to you, my friend.

      In kindness and respect,

      Gary

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  8. Everything counts. Good thing is, we are listening!

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    1. Hi Ray,

      Everything counts and it adds up to positive total. With us listening to each other, this could be start of a better reality for all.

      In peace and hope, your way,

      Gary

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  9. There are people who are bitter, grumpy, and negative and they will never see the true joys the world has to offer.

    You chose the right attitude and were blessed because of it.

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    1. Hi L. Diane Wolfe,

      Indeed, there are some people who only see the negative and if you are positive, they try to immerse you with their negativity. Sadly, some refuse to see the good in the world. They are happy being miserable.

      I know you would rather live your life with realistic positive anticipation rather than, negative speculation. Bless you, my friend.

      In hope and positivity, your way,

      Gary

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  10. I think how you chose to spend Christmas is awesome and inspiring. It's given me some ideas for next year if we can sell and move to a town where there are people. I mentioned the idea to my husband and he didn't hesitate in his reply, "Sure."

    Happy New Year, Gary. Best of everything!

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    1. Hi Joylene,

      Thank you. To me, trying to interact with those who might be sad, lonely, or just wanted to chat for the heck of it, was a better plan than me sitting here and thinking doom and gloom. An all round inspiring outcome and I shall continue to do this.

      It appears your hubby is enthusiastic about your ideas for next year. Sure, eh...

      A peaceful and inspiring New Year to you, your hubby and all those who have the wondrous privilege of knowing you.

      In kindness and good wishes, your way,

      Gary

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  11. I love what you did at Christmas and I love your positive and inspiring attitude. Happy New Year :-) x

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    1. Hi Teresa,


      Thank you, Teresa. I'm very pleased that I did this. I have been truly touched by the response and I visualise better times ahead for those who understand that we can all be here for each other.

      And a Happy New Year to you and your loved ones.

      In kindness and peaceful wishes,

      Gary x

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  12. I'm so glad you enjoyed your day! I've found, like you, that helping others is a great way to fight depression. Your tale of Christmas with the family was highly entertaining...
    Happy New Year my dear friend,
    Tina @ Life is Good
    http://kmdlifeisgood.blogspot.com/

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    1. Hi Tina,

      I found enjoyment out of keeping busy on Christmas Day. Busy was a distraction that kept my illness in the background. I know that you, dear lady, that your gift of empathy not only helps others, but helps you. Of course, that family at Christmas was made up. I'm glad you were entertained by the surreality of it.

      A peaceful and positive New Year, my good friend.

      In kindness,

      Gary

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  13. Klahani,
    OMG I was ROFLOL .....this is the classic family. I saw Lampoons Christmas movie and they ain't got nothing on your family. You are one funny dude.

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    1. Hi Manzanita,

      I'm really pleased you liked this fictional family. This family I made up could have their own reality TV show. Or would that be unreality... We could make this family make Monty Python seem like serious drama :) I appreciate your thoughts and you know that writing this was a form of therapy for me. Weird therapy :) Thank you, my dear friend.

      In peace and a good laugh, your way,

      Gary

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  14. I do hope those family happenings were fictionalized, exaggerated or at least dramatized for our enjoyment. I'm blessed with a family that loves each other and places high value on having a good time with each other. One of the best things about Christmas, for me, is that the extended family has the opportunity to gather and revel in genuine merriment.

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    1. Hi Jeff,

      Yes sir, totally made up family. Some might sort of relate to such a family. Thank goodness you are blessed with a sharing, caring, loving family. When I read such a comment, I'm truly heartened. My family are so very far away in Vancouver, Canada. Yet, despite the miles, we are very close. Thank you, Jeff.

      With good wishes to you and all your family,

      Gary

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  15. Christmas can be difficult with family and lonely without. I'm glad you were able to reach out to people and make a difference.

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    1. Hi fairyhedgehog,

      You summed it up very well. It was my honour to do my best to reach out to those who might feel that nobody cares. We all show that we care.

      In peace and happy wishes, your way,

      Gary

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  16. I was kind of sick on Xmas day. I'm looking at a life alone once mom and dad are dead. It kind of sucks.

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    1. Hi Michael,

      That's a real bummer you weren't very well on Christmas Day. I hope you are better now. Life, when our parents are gone, can leave such a void. I wish you peaceful thoughts and I'm here for you.

      In kindness and sincerity,

      Gary

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  17. YES, YES AND YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!! you gave the GREATEST gift of ALL! "To direct my focus onto something positive, instead of being overwhelmed by sadness, taught me some valuable lessons. If we do help each other, we really do help ourselves. "

    Sending much love your way!

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    1. Hi Caren,

      For a second there I thought you were re-enacting that scene from "When Harry met Sally" :) Ignore me... Seriously, the gifts we share, of kindness and caring, are a wonder to behold.

      Much love and appreciation to you, my friend.

      Gary

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  18. I tried to join twitter (not that I know what it is used for) but the internet wouldn't allow me in. I had no idea how to contact you on facebook and your email address fell off my side of the earth.

    SO....I immensely enjoyed watching Beau as he unwrapped his christmas toys. He showed more joy than I've ever witnessed from humans, and suddenly, all was right in my world.

    I wish everything to be right in yours also.

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    1. Hey lotta joy,

      Ah, twitter. I haven't a clue what that's all about. Something about expressing my 'highly important' thoughts in 140 characters or less. One can get a private message through it, also. And Farcebook, sorry, Facebook, I have a link on the right side of my blog. Probably doesn't work. My email address was working the last time I checked. Sorry the darned thing fell off on your side of the planet.

      Most importantly is that you got to watch Beau display appreciation for his Christmas toys. While some humans I know would complain about a gift and not understand that the intentions were good, even if I didn't need a new pair of stilettos.

      Thank you for your kind wishes. It means a lot.

      In peace and hope to you, my friend.

      Gary

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  19. klahanie, your comment to me was hilarious!! at any hour i'll accept your ramblings! you should have chatted with me on christmas. i would have kept you company! it seems the older we get (yeah, i know, you're not older, your decreasing in age, right?) we don't get the christmas we got as a kid. i wish you to have a good new year my dear friend!!

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    1. Hey Tammy,

      I was so glad you liked my comment that I thought would hopefully tie in with your posting. You seem to rejoice in surreality and I've been known to leave long winded, rambling sentences that use the conjunction word "and" a bit too much and as you read the run on sentence and suddenly realise that reading a run on sentence can leave you gasping for breath....

      I would of enjoyed chatting with you on Boxing Day Eve aka Christmas Day. We could of talked about the good old days as I recall my long sideburns and flared jeans and find myself back in the seventies and looking like some dude out a dubious seventies movie that involved a variety of farmyard animals...

      When I turned 40, I started counted backwards. Gosh, I'm now 21! :) The inner child stills marvels at the wonders of Christmas, the four walls and the twinkly lights :) Wishing you much happiness and joy in 2013, my dear friend.

      In kindness and rambling comment, your way,

      Gary :)

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  20. Dear Gary,
    I'm so glad that your Christmas Day went OK, and you managed to make a difference by helping out others. I tend to think that you can get more pleasure out of giving than receiving, and I always remember when I was just wee that I liked giving presents more than getting them. But, hey, that's just the kind of unbelievably pleasant individual I am!
    Sending many positive wishes your way, for now and the New Year,
    David.

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    1. Dear David,

      Indeed, Christmas Day was kept busy by doing my utmost to interact with others, regardless of their situation. It was inspiring and kept me focused.

      I've always knew you were the type, even when you were but a wee lad, who would find more pleasure in seeing others' eye light up in wonder as you bestowed gifts upon them. I firmly believe your pleasant and altruistic demeanour, has no boundaries.

      Thank you, peasant, sorry, pleasant David.

      May the New Year bring new hopes and adventures in your life.

      Gary

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  21. So, you and Penny were discussing the meaning of life... barking up the appropriate tree I suppose!? I know it's still a joy to have a (grown) child to have a celebration with... no matter how brief the moment. Sometimes all it takes is a smile to keep us warm and comforted. That's what your posts (and Penny's) bring to my world. Even though we didn't chat this year... know that I thought of you and of course your Grinch story I had hoped you'd re-post! Oh well, love you guys anyway.

    I was so hoping no other "Uncle Bert" existed. Of course we call ours "Uncle Bernt" because of the sound he makes when passing gas. Aw, Gary, can you be any wittier? This was great. And ~ Happy 2013!

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    1. Hi Dixie,

      So lovely to see you, dear friend :) Yes indeed, Penny and myself discussed the meaning of life as she barked up a Dogwood tree :) I am blessed to be able to cherish those fleeting moments with Tristan. For I know that he craves to start his own life and gain some independence.

      I am heartened that our posts bring you a smile, some warmth, some comfort. That is what we truly wish. Sorry about not posting the "Grinch" story this year. Ah yes, the Cynic's Christmas Party. Next thing you know, I'll be calling Christmas Day, "Boxing Day Eve" :)

      Aha, Uncle Butt, for that matter. The man who can do Christmas Carols via the varying tones in his flatulence :)

      Thank you, Dixie. I'm wishing you the most joyous New Year and that your new adventures inspires you as it inspires others.

      In peace and goodwill,

      Gary

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  22. Every caring breath you take you are making a difference for someone. I have no doubt that knowing that you are there for people lightens darkness and despair for many people.
    Every good wish for a positive, healing New Year is heading your way.

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    1. Hi The Elephant's Child,

      You are very kind. And with every breath of hope we share, may those who feel sad, feel lonely, breath a sigh of understanding that we are all equal, all valid. Dear friend, you are a beacon of light that shines on this fragile planet. For that and through your interaction, I'm profoundly grateful.

      May the New Year of 2013, bring you peace and joy.

      In kindness and warm wishes,

      Gary

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  23. Gary, you provided what we all wish we had for the holidays- someone to be there. There is no higher gift to give than your caring, and your time.
    A happy, healthy, fun 2013 to you and yours, my friend.
    Laura
    x

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    1. Hi Laura,

      Oh yes, somewhere to be there, to show others who are struggling, who feel alone, that we show the caring and compassion they truly deserve. Thank you, Laura.

      And to you and your loved ones, a joyous, positive 2013.

      In kindness,

      Gary
      x

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  24. Aye, I'm with you there, pre-hubby I spent all my Christmas's alone, twas just the way our family rolled, and I always reached out to find out if anyone I knew, or a friend of a friend was going to be alone, and then invited them for Christmas dinner and good cheer. Although I rather like my own company, and have never felt lonely at Christmas, I know it affects others quite strongly and to give on that day is a fine thing to do, even if it's just your time. Your caring will have made a big difference I'm sure. We should always reach out to each other, but also appreciate the pleasure of being alone with our lovely pets (and son in your case), when others haven't even got a home to go to. Happy New Year to you and Penny, from myself, hubby and Lardy, may 2013 be a fine vintage, full of love and laughter and minus misery and pian for you both. And me too. *hugs xx

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    1. Hi All Consuming,

      We doth singeth the same songs of hope, my friend. It has been many a year since we had outside company visit on Christmas Day. It seemed those I invited had other arrangements. Like you, I'm fine with my own company and as stated in my surreal family part of the posting, there can be advantages to being alone :)

      I also know how the day impacts those who really are in distress. You dear lady, embrace the same caring ideals. I knew that of you. I am blessed to have a son who perhaps makes a fleeting visit down the hallway to his room. I am blessed to have a dog that shows such unconditional love. I have all I need and yet, I know that the poor folks in pain, need to know we are here for them.

      I used to work for a charity that worked with the homeless and the rough sleepers. I spent one Christmas Day feeding those poor people, remarkable people who did not fit the convenient stereotypes. And yes, after I spent the day with them, I had a home to go back to. Many only had a car park and cardboard box to welcome them. We are so grateful for all we have and to share our hopes with others, is most powerful. Much respect and admiration to you, your hubby and Lardy.

      Be this New Year be one of happiness and positivity in your lives. Hugs, your way,

      Gary xx

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  25. Hi Gary - I'm so pleased to read that you were able to reach out ... I'm sure the fact you were around has meant much to many. Glad too to read that Tristan had been out with friends before returning home - youngsters pick their own pieces don't they .. but at least he was home.

    Penny is another special person .. and being able to have a conversation putting the world to rights must have been an interesting cuddly chat ...

    My body decided the best place for it was bed with a dose of gastric flu .. still not quite right - so now I'm doing a Penny - catching my tail! Also that's it - been ill this year .. health abounds now - and once I've sorted all this paperwork out - I'll be way happier and raring to go for 2013 ...

    Very glad to read a positive post and that you managed your way through .. I do sincerely hope 2013 is a better year for you and Tristan ... big hugs and all the very best - Hilary

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    1. Hi Hilary,

      Very kind of you to go back to this posting. And this makes it so clear that like I try to do, you also reach out to others. I'm grateful for that. My son had spent Christmas Eve and most of Christmas Day at his mother's home. Of course, upon his return, the call of the X Box was too difficult to resist. Oh well, he's a good young man and his heart's in the right place. Or is that left place...

      Penny is a very wise dog and I've learnt a lot from her. We sorted out the world between the two of us :)

      I know you have been so poorly during a time of the year when one especially wouldn't want to be ill. Or anytime, of course. Once you clear your paperwork, your positive, clear focus for a fulfilling New Year will be realised.

      We are most grateful for your kind wishes. May 2013 be your best ever. Hugs and admiration, your way,

      Gary

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  26. Hi Gary, I'm playing a lil' catch up with blog visiting, as you obviously see.

    You Christmas experience and my own were like polar opposites- situation-wise.

    You and I kinda told each other what our Christmas season was like on FB and I caught the part where you said you were going to help people out around this time and that time.

    I think I like your Christmas experience better in a lot of ways. I wasn't lacking for company during the four family gathers (because no on can get along well enough to have it at just two places). It was one of anxiety. But I did have my wife to share it all with and we did get together at my Aunt's place- and that was pretty great and fun. We made each other laugh, despite what was happening around us. I even managed to invite an old friend to one gathering. He makes silly pg-rated jokes. The kind that are so silly, they're actually funny.

    I also see how it would be so gratifying, with yours, to help people out who are sound, lonely or confused. You were helping them just by listening... not to mention what was said.

    You're a good guy, dude, no matter how naughty other people say you are. ;) Best wishes and and a bag of cat poop your way.

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    1. Hi Kelly,

      Very good of you to play blog catch up. I thank you for commenting on this now previous posting to whatever I have now posted. And when I can compose myself, I shall delight you with a highly cherished comment on your superb blog.

      Ah yes, I put it out there that anybody who was sad or lonely or just wanted to chat for the heck of it, could contact me via various network sources. It was a distraction that I believe was a bit of comfort for all concerned.

      Of course, my family was fictional. My real family are a lot weirder :) I reckon that your anxiety levels were rather lowered by the fact you could all have a good laugh and perhaps a collective fart or three.

      Christmas Day, although vastly different than yours, was a profound and inspiring day. I didn't feel alone and I hope that just those moments of interaction made others understand that they need not feel alone.

      Ah yes and despite all those evil things folks say about you, I don't believe any of them :) Best wishes, a Hippy New Year and a bag of steaming doggy doo, your way,

      Gary

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  27. I know I'm a little late commenting on this one, but I thought it was beautiful. I love your attitude and that you reached out to others. My husband has to work most of the holidays and I catch myself having a really rotten attitude about it sometimes, but I like your positive perspective and will try to imitate it more.

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    1. Hi Danielle,

      Most thoughtful of you to comment on this past posting. Thank you. I believe that trying to take an unfortunate situation and focus on others who might need some positive distraction, not only hopefully helps them, but helps me. Welcome back and I shall visit your latest posting, real soon.

      A peaceful, positive 2013, to you and your loved ones,

      Gary

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I do try to comment back to each commenter individually. However, I might have to shorten my replies or give a group thank you. That way, I can spend more time commenting on your blogs. Thank you and peace, my friend.