Saturday, 12 March 2011

Hello Ogopogo.

I am looking forward, with great anticipation, a trip back to my other home in May.  I shall be visiting my 'adoring fans', back in British Columbia.  One of the places I hope to be visiting is Kelowna, situated beside beautiful Okanagan Lake, in the heart of the Okanagan Valley.  You can click  Kelowna History  to find out more.
Part of the history of Kelowna includes the legend of a lake 'monster' known as 'Ogopogo' or 'N'ha-a-itk' (pronounced Naitaka), by the Salish First Nations tribe.  Naitaka means 'lake demon'.  The name, Ogopogo, was evidently a parody of a British ditty and goes like this: "His mother was an earwig: His father was a whale: A little bit of head And hardly any tail-And Ogopogo was his name."  For further info on Ogopogo or Naitaka, you can click on this link, The Legend of Ogopogo  

Here is a photograph of my son at twenty one months old.  To avoid confusion, the lady is his mother and the green creature is a replica of Ogopogo.  This photo was taken at Kelowna City Park, way back in 1990.

Okay, enough of all this information.  It's time for a 'serious' discussion.  I tire of all the hype surrounded the 'Loch Ness Monster', or if you prefer, 'Nessie'.  Because, as far as I'm concerned, Ogopogo is the most underrated and has been, for far too long, a shy and modest lake monster.
No more, I say, no more.  It's time for Nessie and Ogopogo to 'battle' it out in a neutral lake to decide who is like the most awesome n' stuff, lake monster.  I can see it now as the two slimy beasts go flipper to flipper in a contest to decide, once and for all, who's the mightiest of monsters from the murky deep.
So Ogopogo looks at Nessie and says, 'Hey Nessie, hows it goin eh!?'  A puzzled Nessie responds 'Och aye Ogopogo!  I am the amazing Loch Ness Monster, loved and adored my millions.  Very few humans know who you are and they even made a movie about me!  Beat that!'  To which Ogopogo replies, ' Well, there's a replica of me in a park in Kelowna!'
And thus as the Canadian and Scottish fans cheer on these bitter rivals, the two lake monsters embrace and have rampant, unabashed sex.   Due to this bizarre turn of events, no clear winner was realised.  Although, I firmly believe, if Ogopogo had the inclination, Ogopogo would have kicked Nessie's Scottish butt so hard, that Nessie would have gone back to Scotland and drowned its sorrows in a bottle of the finest malt whisky.
'Ogopogo, the Movie', with the soundtrack that includes, 'Oh No Ogopogo' and 'Here We Go, Ogopogo, Here We Go', will be coming to a cinema near you.


  1. Loved the post and I'm so envious of your coming visit to your other home. I hope you have a wonderful time. x

  2. Wow, great picture of two monsters and a boy. Good post too. I think there are a lot of things in this world that we want to say are just stories but they say all myths have a grain of truth to them. Hmmmm, I wonder if Bigfoot likes to dip in the lake as well. Cheers!

  3. Hi Carole,
    Thank you for your nice words. I'm sure I will have a wonderful time :)
    Hope you are having a most pleasant weekend.
    Hugs Gary x

  4. Hi Heather,
    Aha, yes, "two monsters and a boy". Hmmmm...:-)
    I want to have a nice chat with Ogopogo. I want to be its agent. Gonna' be rich, I tell you, rich!
    And indeed, must check if our hairy friend, the 'Sasquatch', is dipping its rather large toes in the lake.
    Cheers me dear.
    Gary :-)

  5. Wow Gary! I too recently wrote about our favorite sea monster in Lake Champlain lovingly called Champ. I'd like to get him in on the Nessie, Ogopogo contest. One thing is for sure, Ogopogo definitely gets first in Name. I love the way this sea monster's name rolls off my tongue!

    BTW, the photo of your son is adorable! I hope you have a fun visit. I loved Vancouver and the surrounding area. It's just so unbelievably beautiful!

  6. Hi THE SNEE,
    I'm really sorry I missed that article of yours. I've been somewhat out of touch with the blogging world, just lately. You know, personal crap can get in the way.
    I'm very aware of 'Champ' and I posted in such a way that I hoped someone would mention other possible contenders in the best darned lake monster contest. So thanks to adding Champ as a possible participant. This may create a follow up posting! :)
    'Ogopogo' is a great name to be chanted at a sporting event. 'Let's go, Ogopogo, let's go!'
    Thanks for liking the photo. I really should invest in a scanner to make the pictures clearer. Vancouver is indeed beautiful. And where Ogopogo lives, the terrain is so different, in fact desert like.
    Thank you for your well wishes regarding my upcoming trip to BC.
    May you have a lovely weekend.
    Kind wishes, Gary :-)

  7. Great post, Gary! I had no idea that Canada had a Nessie like monster too. I wonder if they are cousins???

    It seems you are looking forward to your trip. :)

  8. Well, Sir Gary, great picture. And thanks for clarifying any possibility of confusion :)

    I hope you enjoy your return visit, and if you happen to be planning a foray to the capital of this beautiful province then do let me know. It would be great to meet you in person.

  9. Hi Gary,
    I am going to click on your history links to find out more! I have been to Loch Ness on many an occasion, but never seen the monster, but ofcourse as the film says,`you have to believe in it to see it`. It is amazing how every year in May there is a `sighting` of Nessie, has this anything to do with the start of the tourist season and wanting visitors to go to Scotland?
    Hope you have a good trip.
    Follow me at HEDGELAND TALES

  10. Hello Gary my friend, you know something, I'm viewing your blog from the wilderness where you are lucky if the internet, during one of its better mood, decides to pay you a visit. And when it does it comes veeery ssllooolwly...

    Worse, after reloading about five times and half an hour later your blog finally appears, but all I can see are words, no image. So I don't have a clue how your son or Ogy looks like. But I just can't wait to put this comment in. I will have to view them again when I get back to civilization.

    But I do want to wish you a pleasant trip and an enjoyable return to what sounds like a place you cherish...

    Good grief, this is one long comment...:))

    Take care my friend, sending greetings from the jungle here.

  11. Hi Gary .. I'd love to read more about the Kelowna .. one day I'll be able to spend some time reading up.

    Gosh what a wonderful trip to look forward to in May ..

    Loch Ness monster in Canada .. interesting! Cheers Hilary

  12. I;m more inclined to think that this is the greatest love story never told!! Lovely Ogopogo sets scaly eyes on beautiful Nessie and Cupid does the rest!! Awwww think of the lovely Ogo-Nessie juniors!!!! Awwww!

    Take care

  13. great post and safe travels

  14. If everything works out well, we get to sneak in a visit. I'm due to be in Penticton, (next door to Kelowna) sometime in May. Crossing fingers, toes, and nose hairs that the timing matches up with your visit and the universe makes it happen. So, as Heather says: ommmmmmmm

  15. Hi Raining Acorns,
    Thank you for your kind wishes. Very much appreciated.
    Hope you are having a peaceful weekend :-)
    Kind wishes, Gary.

  16. Hi Sharon,
    Thanks and I reckon they might be cousins...kissing cousins, perhaps
    Very much looking forward to the trip and all the parades in my honour! LOL
    Take care Sharon and happy writing.
    Kind wishes, Gary.

  17. Greetings Sir Ian,
    Thanks and yes, the green beast is Ogopogo :-)
    I'm not too sure if I will be able to make it to Vancouver Island. Would be nice, because I'd like to stop over on the Gulf Islands. I shall contact you, closer to the time and let you know. It would be my honour to meet you, good Sir :-)
    Hope your are having an awesome weekend in beautiful BC.
    In kindness, Gary.

  18. Hi John,
    I'm sure you will find the links quite fascinating. You may also note the very different terrain within the Okanagan Valley.
    And Loch Ness in May and the start of tourist season in that area. No doubt, 'sightings' of 'Nessie' will magically increase :-)
    Thanks for wishing me a good trip.
    Take good care, Gary.

  19. Hi Grandpa,
    My kind friend, I'm ever so sorry to note that the internet where you are, can be somewhat sloooooooow...
    I do so hope you eventually manage to read my reply comment :-)
    I have encountered the same situation as you describe. In fact, your blog is one of those that sometimes struggles to load up your marvellous photos. However, if I click on the space of the 'blank' photo, the photo then appears. You might like to try that in the future :-)
    Here's hoping you get to see the photos, very soon.
    Thank you for your well wishes on my upcoming trip. It is my other home and it will be nice to see all my very dear friends and family :-)
    Sending a big smile and a big hello, back to you in the Malaysian jungle :-)
    With respect and kindness, Gary.

  20. Hi Hilary,
    I do so hope you manage to read more about Kelowna and the fascinating place that is the Okanagan Valley :-)
    I'm sure I will have a wonderful time in BC.
    Yes a Canadian type lake 'monster'. I'm so looking forward to the 'movie' on its life :-)
    All the best, Gary.

  21. Hi Old Kitty,
    For sure, this could be a love story to equal or better the ongoing love between the 'wee folks', 'Fidelina' and Geoffrey the garden gnome :-)
    Ogopogo and Nessie have little baby 'monsters'. So is Ogopogo a female and Nessie the male? Anyone got close enough to check this out? LOL
    Penny the Jack Russell dog says 'hello' to Charlie and your good self :-)
    Cheers, Gary

  22. Hi becca,
    Thanks for that and for your well wishes for my upcoming trip. Very much appreciated :-)
    In kindness, Gary.

  23. Hi Joylene,
    Aha, it would be very nice if indeed our paths do cross :-) You know you are one of my true heroes and it would be awesome to meet up. I've spent many a fun time in Penticton....but that's another story :-)
    Hmmmm...I have to double check and see if there is a parade in my honour in Penticton, Summerland, Peachland, Vernon, Osoyoos, Naramata, Keremeos and ummm Kelowna! LOL eh.
    I was delighted that Heather and your kind self, have interacted!
    Hope you are having a lovely weekend in beautiful BC.
    In kindness, Gary.

  24. I was once part of a mission to see the Loch Ness monster. The mission failed. I mean, my friends decided that they'd rather get drunk in Newtonmore and drive back to Edinburgh the next day. So I'm team Ogopogo now.

    Enjoy your trip, and don't forget us while you're there!

  25. Gary, ol pal, I'm finally giving making your fantasy come true. I'm visiting your humble blog and I'm throwing in the additional bonus of commenting on your bangin' blog. It's been a busy weekend. My apologies for being late to the party.

    And now that I've taken a giant paragraph to explain my absence, I want to say I checked out both of those links. Kelowna sounds like my kinda place. Lots of beautiful, natural scenery and an underrated sea monster to boot. Ogopogo sounds sort of like a game or something that you can use to bounce up and down on. Eh, what's the word I'm searching for? Hmmm. I better not go there. :-) Another somewhat underrated, but not so much like Ogopogo, sea monster would be Champ of Lake Champlain in North America. Of course, Nessie gets all the press. Like you, I've read and seen enough about her to make me wanna puke up a Plesiosaurus. I think your fight between Mr. Ogo and Ms. Nessie should be made into another cheesy, crappily made sci-fi movie on the Syfy Channel that they're so fond of making. You could see your story to the producers. At least the script you have written up would provide some laughs to save it from being a total bomb.

    Have a good trip when you leave, dude, in May. I bet you are looking forward to coming back. Take care.

  26. Dear Gary,
    Ah, the famous (or should I say, not so famous) Ogopogo lake monster. I used to be fascinated with "Nessie" as a child and, indeed, by all things "magical and mysterious" and remember well all those "Nessie" photos which, I think, in the end, turned out to be fake. Maybe, unlike Nessie then, Ogopogo actually exists!
    Nice post, Gary.
    Yours with Very Best Wishes,
    P.S. Will be in touch soon about the upcoming "Mental Health Fair" in Stoke.

  27. Hello Gary,
    I'm back, and I can see clearly now the rain has, that's by Credence Clearwater Revival, I think...

    Let me start again, I can see your beautiful boy and his mum, and Ogo now, which is so green. I think she'll give Nessie the run for her money. You perhaps need to set the Guinness Record Book straight, eh?

    Reading Joylene's comment there, I'm so very tempted to book a flight to join you both...that would be fun, wouldn't it?

  28. I posted a comment on here before going to bed last night but it doesn't seem to have worked :(.

    Anyway, the bit about the two having rampant sex actually made me LOL.

    I hope you have a safe, relaxing and enjoyable journey


  29. Hahaha I enjoyed your post. :-)

    Ogopogo definitely rolls off the tongue better than Loch Ness Monster... No reason why he can't get his own movie.

  30. Love it :)

    As a Canadian with parents & family from Scotland I'm a little torn - which side to cheer for???

  31. Hi Chris,
    Now, that's sound, logical reasoning. When a mission to check out 'Nessie' fails, it's definitely time to join the ever growing fan base for 'team Ogopogo' :-)
    Thank you for your kind wishes in regards to my trip to Canada. I most certainly wont forget you and shall do my best to interact with you and all those I have the great privilege of being associated with, within this, the great blogging community.
    In peace and kindness, Gary :-)

  32. Howdy Kelly,
    My dear and illustrious friend who has graced me with his mighty presence, I cannot even begin to express my gratitude that you, from the upper echelons of blogsville, would even find the time to visit my most unworthy blog. Thank you, thank you, and thank you! :-) Seriously, my friend, I hope you are okay.
    Thanks for checking out the links. Kelowna is an awesome place and has loads of really cool Canadians drinking 'real' beer and saying 'eh' a lot eh.
    Ogopogo is a very underrated lake 'monster' and it is time for this noble creature to finally get the blatant publicity it truly deserves. Ogopogo, the game, coming to a sex shop near you.
    Yes, I'm very aware of Champ and that 'monster' might like want to enter a contest for all the world's lake monsters. There are many to choose from, but my money's with Ogopogo becoming the overall winner. Sorry Champ :-)
    Yes indeed dude, a movie with Ogopogo, Nessie, a demented sex-starved Sasquatch, a rather bemused Yeti and a token good ol' boy from Alabama. I think, despite it having the potential to be total crap, that we might just put our two brains together on this and see if some idiot in Hollywood or a back street movie producer is willing to take on this concept.
    Thanks Kelly, for the good wishes for my trip. Did you know there are some very well kept secret parades in my honour n' stuff? :-)
    And yes, coming back will be like lots of fun as I sit in my living room and remember that I got to stroke Ogopogo's flippers and got it really aroused with euphoric joy, even more joyous than that overrated Scottish lake monster, 'Nessie'!
    Take care eh :-)

  33. Dear David,
    Aha, so you had a bit of a fascination with 'Nessie'. For sure, there has been a lot of hype, a lot of 'photos' of Nessie and I can understand you being intrigued with the very possibility of its existence. I suppose there is a slight chance that Nessie exists.
    Sightings of Ogopogo were noted long before the Europeans descended upon the New World and I believe that Ogopogo is there in Okanagan Lake and waiting to meet me :-)
    Yes, it will be interesting to find out more info on the upcoming 'Mental Health Fair'.
    Very kind wishes, your way, Gary.

  34. Howdy Grandpa,
    "I can see clearly now, the rain is gone, I can see all obstacles in my way..." sung by Johnny Nash. :-)
    Thank you very much for returning and I am in the process of visiting you and your latest posting :-)
    Yes, that's my boy, could not get a very clearly focused photo of a photo, but at least you can note that the 'green one' is the monster:-)
    The Guinness Book of World Records needs to record the event when Ogopogo kicks Nessie's butt! :-)
    Flippin' heck, Grandpa, how neat would that be? You visiting England when I'm here and then you coming to British Columbia to see that famous and gifted Canadian author Joylene, whose latest book, "Broken But Not Dead" is due for release in 61 days and ties in nicely with my much anticipated return and parades to celebrate me, yes, shy and humble me.
    Dude, let the fun begin :-)

  35. Hi Nas,
    Yes, that's weird. Once again, your comment showed up in my emails, but not as a comment. However, once again, your second attempt, for which I'm grateful, has shown up :-)
    Two lake monsters getting it on and lusting for each other, is quite the visual eh LOL
    Thank you for your very kind wishes.
    With respect to you and your terrific writing, Gary :-)

  36. Hi Misha,
    Hey, thanks for enjoying my post:-)
    For sure eh, 'Ogopogo, Revenge of the Canadian Lake Monster'. Coming to a cinema near you.
    And Misha, 'grammar anarchy' is the new 'rock n' roll' :-)

  37. Hi Jemi,
    Thanks for that :-)
    So my fellow Canadian, 'how's it goin' eh! :-)
    Ah, you must cheer for Ogopogo. I might be living in England, right now, but if England is playing Canada in a sporting event, I cheer, very quietly, for Canada. Jemi, you must keep this a secret.
    Thanks for visiting and linking into my shy and oh so humble site.
    See ya later eh, Gary :-)

  38. Hi Gary,
    I actually watched the documentary on Ogopogo on the History Channel (yes, Ogopogo has a documentary!... and was just amazed to discover that Ogopogo is the most sighted sea monster in the world, more sightings even than Nessie :)

    Here's the link to the History Channel Monster Quest show...

    MonsterQuest: Lake Demons

  39. Hi joanne,
    Thanks for the info. I'm not surprised that Ogopogo is the most observed lake 'monster' :-) In fact, based on the History Channel documentary, I think it's time that the movie about Ogopogo, its dreams, its hopes, desires and aspirations, with a kinky love scene or two, was made into a movie! :-) Take that Nessie!
    With respect and kind wishes, your way, Gary

  40. Dear Gary,
    Just a little note to say that I hope you're feeling better than when we spoke the other day. Hopefully I will see you at the Mental Health Fair in Stoke (not Hanley!) tomorrow. Please don't feel under any obligation to go, though, and if I don't see you there, you know you are always welcome to ring or visit.
    Yours with Very Best Wishes,

  41. Hi Gary. I don't know how, but someway or other I managed to miss this post!
    Do people really believe in Ogopogo's existence like some do about Nessie?
    Bazza’s Blog ‘To Discover Ice’

  42. Dear David,
    Thank you for your follow-up comment. I shall be unable to attend as I'm challenging a rather dark state of mind.
    I shall give you a phone call for a nice chat. Thanks David.
    In kindness, Gary.

  43. Hi bazza,
    I very much appreciate you discovering this posting and taking the time to comment.
    I keep an open mind on Ogopogo's existence. I would like to think this lovable lake 'monster' really does exist.
    Cheers bazza.
    Kind wishes, Gary.

  44. I grew up as a teenager reading all about Nessie, Champ, Ogopogo, and the other fabulous lake monsters. It was great fun and interesting, but I find it hard to put a probability on their existence. Howsomever, I can't say Ogopogo without thinking..."I GO POGO!" Remembering the Pogo of comic strip fame and his Presidential Run. I would like to be the first one to spot Bigfoot riding Ogopogo like a bucking bronc while waving a cowboy hat. Keep a sharp eye out on your trip. Have fun.

  45. This made me smile. Was definitely not expecting lake monster sexual relations. lol.

    And thanks for clarifying the beast vs. the woman in the photo.

    Tee hee.

  46. Hi Count Sneaky,
    And there are plenty of lake 'monsters' to choose from. You have mentioned three of the best known and loved. Still, I reckon that it's time Nessie got less publicity and those other deserving lake creatures got their own blockbuster movie deal :-)
    It would be kinda' neat to think they might really exist.
    I'm not that familiar with 'Pogo' the comic strip. I do, however, remember the 'Pogo Stick' and it had its ups and downs...
    Of course, in Canada, that would be a 'Sasquatch' waving a cowboy hat while riding good ol' Ogopogo :-)
    I shall keep a close eye out of Ogopogo and try to take photographs of that noble beast.
    Thanks for your kind wishes regarding my upcoming trip.
    May you and your loved ones have a great weekend.
    In kindness, Gary.

  47. Hi Stephanie,
    I want to thank you very much for visiting my shy and humble blog and kindly leaving a comment :-)
    Yes indeed, Ogopogo does Nessie.
    And the women, now Stephanie you must keep this a secret, that women, no, not the green creature, is my former spouse. Yikes, sometimes she reads my blogs and thus, 'hello former spouse and please don't be angry with me.'
    Oh yeah, where was I? Thanks again for your comment and for linking into my silly blog.
    Have a peaceful and pleasant weekend.
    Take care eh,
    Gary :-)

  48. Aw that's a lovely picture of your son and Ogopogo. To tell you the truth, I've only known Nessie as the lake monster. Ogopogo makes me think of corn flakes. I don't know why. But on a very serious note, I find your post very entertaining! As always, huh. Gary you rock! =)

  49. Hi Shanaz,
    Thanks and that lovely boy is now a lovely young man. Takes after his dad, no doubt! :-)
    Ah yes, there is more than one lake 'monster' and it's time that lovable Ogopogo got the recognition this wonderful creature, truly deserves.
    Hey thanks for thinking my shy and humble postings are entertaining. I appreciate that and Shanaz, you rock!
    Kind wishes and a bowl of Ogopogo cereal, your way, Gary :-)

  50. Good stuff!! I am very intrigued by the history & myth (or not so much ;-) which surrounds lake monsters. Thank you, Gary, for that lesson in Geography & History. Very interesting.

    I'm glad you're excited to visit home. I'm also sure you'll be missing that lovely garden of yours as well. Very beautiful. =)

  51. Hi LilPixi,
    Thank you and I'm glad you are intrigued by the history and the legends that surround those lake monsters. Ogopogo lives in a really neat part of the world and I'm hoping to get its autograph :)
    It's going to be very surreal going back to my other home and visiting friends and family. A very exciting prospect :)
    I shall indeed miss my garden. I dread to think what it might look like when I get back from Canada..yikes :)
    Thank you for such a lovely comment, LilPixi. I am most appreciative.
    In kindness and positive wishes, your way, Gary :)

  52. So Canada has its very own Nessie...who woulda thunk it??? Damn Gary I didn't realize you've been blogging so long!

    1. Hey Keith,

      Well that worked. Scotland has its very own Ogopogo. My blog has been going since February 2007. I've been discreetly in the background for all this time. I've never promoted myself.

      Thanks for taking the time to comment on this archived posting, Keith.

      Now then, back to Farcebook! LOL

      Gary :)


I do try to comment back to each commenter individually. However, I might have to shorten my replies or give a group thank you. That way, I can spend more time commenting on your blogs. Thank you and peace, my friend.