Tuesday, 19 August 2014

Time To Cope With A Telescope.

I said I'd try and catch up with commenting on other blogs.  Total fail on that.  My humble apologies.  

Since my move from one place to another place, it's been a stressful, chaotic mess.  Doing it all, virtually by myself, has caused me to be most absent from the world of blogging.  It appears it's going to be a stressful, bureaucracy beyond belief, load of crap, for at least another month.  I'm exhausted, both physically and emotionally. 

I know how much you've missed me.  I will endeavour to inform you of what transpired with my move in about a week's time.  

During the hectic farce that has been moving, I had to go to hospital for a discussion about my ongoing male-type issues.  No, not typical dude constantly moaning and thinking about sex every six seconds. I'm talking about waterworks problems.

The urologist has told me they're going to make arrangements to have me come in and have a "telescope" prodded down my urethra. 
The above illustration may be the sort of "telescope" the urologist meant.
















Based on my experiences during moving, I visualised a telescope something like the above being shoved down my tormented trouser snake.  

The above telescope will have the capability of having an up close view of the rings around Uranus. 

Time to cope with a telescope
Maybe yes or maybe nope
Where's there's a willy, there's a way
So they say
I hope 
I cope
With the telescope.

69 comments:

  1. Oh, Gary! Crikey ... I do hope all will be well. Keep us posted and take care xox

    ReplyDelete
  2. I feel your pain... Will you at least get dinner and a movie first?
    Sorry the move has been a stressful mess.
    And we have missed you!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Oh, no! I'd be envisioning the latter scope as well, how scary! Hopefully, it will turn out to be much less intimidating, and the test results will resolve your problem. Nothing worse than health issues! (no, wait - nothing worse than health issues on top of moving chaos!)
    Be well, my friend!

    ReplyDelete
  4. My telescope has a 16" diameter mirror, way to big to be used the way you are talking about. I hope that the telescope they will be using on you will not find anything that shouldn't be there.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I hope your test goes well and is not too uncomfortable!!

    ReplyDelete
  6. I have missed you. Along with a zillion other people who have missed you.
    Good luck with that very painful, intrusive sounding test.
    Hugs.

    ReplyDelete
  7. I hope all goes well with your health problems and I'm sorry to hear that you had to move, Gary. We'll probably be forced to move, ourselves, pretty soon. Take care my ol' blog buddy.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Wish I could say all is well, Bazza. For some unknown reason, my wife and I have had a streak of bad luck since the beginning of the year. Health problems, wife getting laid off from work and financial fiascos. We have, however, just celebrated our 25th Wedding anniversary. Then... When we got back, we received a very bad surprise. I don't want to talk about it in detail Nice to hear from ya. I've missed you, Gary, Rebecca and so many others from the blogging world. My book that I have been working on is finished but I'm having trouble concentrating on creating letters and figuring out what to do next. Anyway... I hope all is well with you and yours, my friend. I haven't forgotten the good times we had interacting. Not at all. Take care, Bazza!

      Delete
  8. May zen-like calm return to your life soon!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Oh Gary, so sorry to hear this on top of the stressful move. I have had a similar procedure but much easier for a woman.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Ouch ewww ick, get a cup for your umm wick. Block that telescope. Next it will wan to elope lol

    ReplyDelete
  11. Good Grief! I got nothing...to say that is ....

    ReplyDelete
  12. Yikes, Gary, I'm pretty sure it's not THAT big, but since I wasn't sure, I asked DH and he gaped at me and said, "Hell no!"

    Breath deeply, dear Gary.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Gary
    I'm laughing at Alex and Pat's comments. I know, taint funny. I know how stressful moving can be since I moved twice last summer and it's still being stressful. Hope everything goes well.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Sorry it's been one thing after another with your stressful move, and worrying about this invasive procedure. Sending lots of good thoughts, and well wishes your way, Gary!

    Julie

    ReplyDelete
  15. Hi Gary - life does not sound easy .. and having things stuck up you, in you .. though the space telescope I hope is just that and is not looking for an internal space somewhere ... all I can say is take care - and you've got some friends with great wit here .. Pat, David and Joylene ... all I can say is it looks the same as it did one million years ago ... I've just been to the Natural History Museum and seen one - an old one .. I've been wondering how it's all going .. now I know - not easy and not pleasant .. my thoughts - Hilary

    ReplyDelete
  16. Yes Gary you have been missed, Good luck at the hospital, will be thinking of you.
    Yvonne.

    ReplyDelete
  17. I hope a bit of peace arrives soon. Moving house can be a nightmare as can trying to insert telescopes into us chaps. . . . . Us chaps have a tendency to scream and run away when a doctor arrives so one turning up with a telescope is scary. . . . I would never let Patrick Moore anywhere near me just in case.

    ReplyDelete
  18. And here I was hoping your move went smoothly and you and Tristan and Penny were all settled in your new homes. What a bummer. Still, hope dies hard. Sending hopeful thoughts your way that the procedure isn't quite as bad as you expect and that it points your doctors in the right direction. Good luck.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Don't worry about not being able to comment Gary!! We know you're super busy. Moving is hectic and is a long process. We will be here when you return. And I winced in pain seeing the picture of that telescope. Hopefully they can give you something that makes it painless.

    ReplyDelete
  20. I hope that procedure goes better than your move, Will think good thoughts for you.

    ReplyDelete
  21. You have not been having an easy time out of it, Gary. Moving is always stressful, but doing it yourself adds to the anxiety. May the next month go more smoothly for you.

    Hopefully, they will give you anesthesia before The Hubble does its searching.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sorry the move has been so stressful, I hope the impending hospital visit goes smoother. Will be thinking about you and sending positive thoughts.

      Delete
  22. OOh Gary, reading this made me cross my legs. Hope it will be ok. If you need a lift or even just a hand to hold when you go for the procedure, you know where we are. Lots of love from Julie. X

    ReplyDelete
  23. Moving is always a drag and even the best of moves are stressful. Doing it on your own? You have every right not to be visiting blogs. Take care of yourself first right now.

    As for probes. I have a history of ovarian cancer in my family so every two years I have to deal with a probe, Think, long ... nevermind. Don't think about it at all!

    ReplyDelete
  24. Oh, I just had a thought for you. Have you ever read anything on the Highly Sensitive Person? After reading your blog for awhile now I wonder if you are and would benefit from empowering yourself with knowledge about being Highly Sensitive. I am a HSP and it has made a world of difference to understand about people like us.

    http://www.hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-test/

    ReplyDelete
  25. *shivers* !!!!!!

    Gary, how AWFUL… I can't even imagine… GAH. I'm so sorry. :/

    And you're right---we HAVE missed you. Really. This lonely blogosphere place is soooooo boring without you!!!!! Keep us updated???

    ReplyDelete
  26. Hi Gary. So brave of you to show us your willy! (It was a picture of you wasn't it?)
    The poem is brilliant. Up to Ogden Nash style I would say :-)
    Continuing my new experiment of naming the music I am listening to while posting or commenting - right now it's: Jackson Browne's 'Rosie'. Good stuff.
    CLICK HERE for Bazza’s fabulous Blog ‘To Discover Ice’

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hey, Bazza... Gary's 'willy', above, looks rather cartoonish.

      Delete
  27. Oooouch! Not a procedure I want to think too much about.

    I totally understand your absence. My travels and subsequent return to catching up with things at home has made my blogging activity somewhat difficult. I guess as long as we don't disappear from the scene totally we'll still be remembered for a while at least.

    Lee
    Tossing It Out

    ReplyDelete
  28. Oh Gary, if it's not one thing, then it's another!
    Sending positive vibes your way!
    WHOOSH-----------POSITIVE VIBES------------------WHOOSH!!!!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  29. Good luck with that my friend. You made me laugh with this one.
    I love how you never lose your sense of humor.
    Welcome back and thank you for coping with all my nonsense on top of that!

    ReplyDelete
  30. Doesn't look like much fun. Sending you positive thoughts.

    ReplyDelete
  31. I had that done in July. I was knocked out. I'm hoping you will be too.

    p.s. Isn't the penis in the drawing a bit....uh....complimentary?

    ReplyDelete
  32. they're going to put a telescope where now? yikes!
    hope everything is okay in there.

    ReplyDelete
  33. Yikes!! I'll be sending positive wishes & thoughts!!! Take care :)
    And no worries (at all!!!) about visiting blogs. Everyone understands completely :)

    ReplyDelete
  34. ugh! On top of everything else you have to have plumbing issues??? NOT FAIR!!!! I bitch and moan and I am a woman, can't imagine how piss poor it has to be for a guy!! Praying things ease up for you soon! ((((hugs)))

    ReplyDelete
  35. Good luck with that, Gary. We'll be sending you positive vibes so everything works out well for you.

    ReplyDelete
  36. I've been absent for quite a while, too, and I feel the same way right now. It's this guilty feeling of not being able to visit all those wonderful people. But don't you worry for a second. We wish we could help you any with that move! What we'll definitely do is wait here patiently until you have settled and have time to come back. Please don't stress yourself out even more because of us! I really hope the move and all the stress that came with it will be over soon!
    And I sure hope that the cytoscopy will go well and that you will hardly feel anything and that everything will be okay. I keep you in my thoughts!

    ReplyDelete
  37. I'm a girl and you still had me crossing my legs while I read this. Best of luck with the procedure and trying to recover from the move. It's a taxing time (emotionally and physically) so please don't put added pressure on yourself with trying to catch up with everybody. We all understand. Take care, my friend.

    ReplyDelete
  38. I cringed while reading about that procedure! YIKES. I do hope that it all goes smoothly for you!

    As far as blogging goes, you do the best you can. Life gets really busy sometimes, and we can't keep up with everything.

    ReplyDelete
  39. Hope all this passes soon and you can relax and have done with all the worry x

    ReplyDelete
  40. Poor you. I hope things get better for you soon. :(

    ReplyDelete
  41. Moving is the worst.....-looks at the cystoscope picture again-.....o.k, second worse.

    Hope things work our for you and get back on that blogging horse when your'e ready.

    Take care!

    ReplyDelete
  42. Oh noes!! What a procedure! And in the middle of you moving! Are you leaving Leek? Sending you tons of support hugs!

    p.s I'm sure I read somewhere about someone who exclaimed "I saw uranus through my telescope"!. ahem. Take care
    x

    ReplyDelete
  43. Yikes! I can imagine this procedure would seem a bit daunting. I hope it is better than expected. Definitely the first scope is better than the second. :)

    Besides this- I hope the rest of the move has been going smoothly!

    Good luck with the test!
    ~Jess

    ReplyDelete
  44. I've been swamped by life too Gary. Sorry to hear about the trouser snake. You're a brave man. My hubs would hear scope and down the urethra and he'd pass out.

    ReplyDelete
  45. Ouch, good luck with that procedure. Since we're all connected in a molecular formation, perhaps he's looking for a lost planet? Hugs to Penny.

    ReplyDelete
  46. I'm so sorry you're going through this. You're in my thoughts.

    ReplyDelete
  47. There are advantages to being female, and right now I'm cherishing that advantage. Sorry and hope the telescope is micro in nature.

    ReplyDelete
  48. Moving is very stressful, at least until things start coming together and looking more like home. Don't forget to take some time for yourself, even if it is just going for a walk. On the health thing- That looks like a very scary procedure.

    ReplyDelete
  49. um......
    um......
    ouch. I think that about sums it up.

    breath! that too, don't forget that!

    ReplyDelete
  50. Sorry, to hear about this latest turn of events..take the time you need to move and get settled..wishing you good health my friend.

    ReplyDelete
  51. Moving and now this, what a pain - sorry no pun intended.
    Take care of yourself Gary, we do miss you but understand that sometimes ‘real’ life has to come before ‘virtual’
    Take it easy and get well soon, Barbara.

    ReplyDelete
  52. A telescope prodded down your urethra? Dear Lord, say it ain't so. Say it!

    ReplyDelete
  53. Sorry to hear this, Gary. I hate medical stuff and as if you didn't have enough going on with the move and everything.

    ReplyDelete
  54. Oh you poor thing! My sympathies!

    ReplyDelete
  55. Here's hoping you are coping with the scoping. This, too, will pass.

    ReplyDelete
  56. Keep your "spirits" up Gary :)

    ReplyDelete
  57. Hi there,

    Yes, it's actually me attempting to comment in a way I don't normally do. Oh my, I'm using a collective pronoun, everybody. My friends, thank you for all your comments. You might be aware that I'm hardly on the internet during my ongoing moving saga. Okay, I have been on a few times to order stuff for my new place. Don't you just love those delivery nightmare situations!

    Yes, I shall stand to attention as I'm probably going to have my "telescope" procedure done in front of a giggling audience of student nurses. YouTube upload opportunity as I get a tube up my tube. September 18 is the big day. Yay and oh what fun.

    Have a lovely weekend, my kind, caring friends.

    Gary :)

    ReplyDelete
  58. Ouch. That's my reaction to the first graphic.

    I love you Gary. I'm so sorry you lost a good friend, but glad you both got to know each other's hearts and senses of humor.

    ReplyDelete
  59. Ouch! Legs crossed as I type o_O and fingers (and everything else remotely crossable) crossed for you, I hope things settle down for you soon X

    ReplyDelete
  60. Hope all goes well, Gary. been thinking about you-- haven't heard from you in a while. Take good care, my friend.

    ReplyDelete
  61. Oops and double oops! Yes, I've been very absent in the amazing world of blogland! I've been multitasking to the point of multitasking the multitasking. Thankfully, a lot of the frantic madness has started to subside. Yay, this means that soon I will, um delight you with my award winning comments. Or something like that.

    Thanks, all. Good grief, me using collective pronouns! STOP it, Gary! :)

    ReplyDelete
  62. I'm just catching up with blogging myself, Gary, and I'm so sorry to read you've had such a difficult time. I hope things will settle down for you soon and that the test was not too painful for you. Most of all I hope they are/were able to find whatever is causing the problems and you can get the treatment you need to feel better.
    Take care, my friend.

    ReplyDelete
  63. Don't you mean an audience of very, very impressed student nurses?

    ReplyDelete
  64. Despite the circumstances, this was hilarious!! Be well... um, okay.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oops and triple oops! Despite have a tube up my tube, I do see the funny side and it got funnier :) Hey Dixie, how are y'all?

      Delete

I do try to comment back to each commenter individually. However, I might have to shorten my replies or give a group thank you. That way, I can spend more time commenting on your blogs. Thank you and peace, my friend.