You may notice that the above photograph may seem somewhat distorted. You may observe that the houses appear to be slanted. My life has been distorted, slanted, obscured by the ominous clouds of a negative situation. Reality became perceptions. Perceptions became reality. Somewhere in that bewildering blur, a positive resilience lingered, it called out my name.
When I took this photograph, I had no idea what the outcome would be. What I saw and what the camera produced, were very different perceptions. I saw a 'normal' vision. Whilst the actual photograph revealed a new 'slant' on things. I had not taken into account that the picture was being shot through the glass window. Through the clearness of the glass; a distortion was created.
These days, I mostly have clear vision. Yet sometimes, I think I am looking at my world with clarity, only to discover that there is distortion. Much like the photo. When this happens, I realise that a past negative environment has, once again, cast a shadow on my positivity. So I seek a positive distraction, a distraction that enforces within me, just how grateful I am for all the good stuff in my life.
The good-natured person fell prey to the cynics. All the good they did was met with derision. The good-natured person became a cynic and preyed on the good-natured person. In my life, sadly, there were folks, who saw my kindness as a sign to take advantage. They were never my friends, just cynical people in a cynical world. I moved on to a place where people embraced the concept of empathy, with no strings attached. I reached for that place that took me to an ultimate test. I had to learn to trust those who truly were sincere. So to those of you I have had the privilege of experiencing genuine kindness; I salute you.
If your life has been one negative heartache after another. If your trust has turned to rust. Please know, there are people out there who are good for your mental health wellbeing. Seek them and immerse yourself in the power of being here for each other.
This has been a whether report. A question of whether of not. Whether is all about alternative possibilities. In the depths of my illness, I grasped the alternative possiblity of learning to love myself. Despite, so many years of being undermined and disrespected, I am nearly there.