To You, My Friend In The Great Blogging Community.

I put up the above photo to enhance the inspiration that fills every fibre of my being.   The golden glow of the setting sun.  The birds of freedom, symbolic of the new life that beckoned me.  Beckoned me to fly, to fly far above the dark and dreary clouds of  doubt and disillusionment.  

The photo above is symbolic of the gratitude I have for you, my friend in the great blogging community.  My last post and the replies you graced me with, are testimony of the powerful magic that we all can share.  We truly are all in this together.  Here for each other and helping each other to make this world a more caring, more compassionate, more understanding place.  This is the positive power that surges through the souls of all of us.

Yes, I am transparent and through such transparency, lies the hope, the dream, the desire, to be as supportive as I can to you.   We both know that through discussion, through better awareness of mental health issues, that the stigma, the stereotypes, the misconceptions, can finally be laid to rest.  We have a long journey ahead. Yet I have witnessed, over the past five years, more and more people reaching out and understanding that there need be no shame in being mentally ill.  Mental health concerns impacts us all.   For the ripple effects spread far and wide.   And that is why we must be here for each other.

I want to thank Delores over at, thefeatherednest, for having that virtual blog party as a celebration of my fifth year blogging anniversary.  It was a kind and touching gesture by Delores.  I am grateful that she also did a follow up post that pointed out various links to mental health resources.   It was a great virtual party with great virtual friends.  Penny the Jack Russell dog and modest internet star, my son and myself were pleased to see so many folks and creatures attend.   We feel blessed by such an open display of kindness at the virtual party.  I remember afterwards having virtual jet lag.

And during some trying times, when I could barely string a sentence together, two dear friends honoured me by submitting a guest posting.   And thus, I wish to thank David, over at, A Day in the Life , a good friend and another champion of seeing the unfair stigma that still surrounds mental health issues, eradicated.   I wish to show my appreciation to Kim, over at,  CindyLu'sMuse , a dear lady with a noble and caring passion to see the precious creatures of our planet treated with the love and respect they truly deserve.   Indeed, Kim a lady who shares with me the gift that is empathy.

Through the wind chimes, ring outs nature's symphonic chorus of peace.  We are all a part of a special orchestra.  The birds of freedom tell us all to fly above the dark and dreary clouds of doubt and disillusionment.  A positive environment starts from within.   From there, we spread the music to all who will listen to the wind chimes. 

The Wind Chimes.

Listen very carefully.   Can you hear those gentle sounds?  The chirping of the happy birds.  The rustling of the branches.  The soothing and peaceful songs of the wind chimes.  Sweet, sweet music dancing upon our ears and dancing in our souls.  Behold, the orchestra of wondrous delight.
I do all that I can to maintain a positive attitude.  Yet the memories of being a scared and lonely little boy haunt this scared and lonely man.  My father was powerful.  He instilled in me an overwhelming sense of being stupid.  To a scared and lonely little boy; if your dad says you're stupid then you must be stupid.
Oh, how I've tried to break his power.  Yet, the chains of doubt still burden my tormented mind.  Indeed, the self doubts and the low self esteem are always there; taunting and teasing me in my everyday life.  It has stifled my ability to get involved.  For the thought of getting caught out and reveal my true stupidity; creates waves of panic, that happen right here, behind closed doors.  I am like that TV series, 'The Littlest Hobo'.  I enter the world of others, try to make them laugh and smile.  Then, like the littlest hobo, I move on.  Familiarity scares the hell out of me.
I sit here alone, night after relentless night.  The battle rages on.  This bizarre double life of mine is confusing and complex.  If you saw me on the street, you would see a cheerful and pleasant man.  If you saw me as I am right now, you would see a paranoid recluse.  It is time for me to breathe.  I shall focus on all that makes me grateful to be alive.
My garden is a statement of peaceful defiance.  As my garden was transformed to a world of great beauty; so too will my life be recreated  through the power of hope.

It is very early on a Friday morning.  All is peaceful.  I look out my living room window and find reassuring comfort from the glowing solar lamps.   Soon the sun will rise and the new dawn will provide fresh desire to live a better life.