Tuesday, 12 July 2016

Not A Pawlitical Pawst.

Hi there, yes it's me, Penny the Jack Russell dog and modest internet superstar!  Once again, I'm taking over this blog site because my human dad, Gary, can't be arsed, is still really lethargic when it comes to putting up a blog pawst. I shall do my very best to come and visit your blog.

A whole bunch of pawlitical stuff has been happening over the last few weeks in the UK.  A lot can happen in a week in pawlitics.  Lately, it seems a lot can happen in five minutes in pawlitics. It's all very distressing and worrying.  Thus, my human friend, this is not a pawlitical pawst.  Not even any mention of a pawed pawlitical announcement.

I want to tell you a heartening, pawsitive story. My human brother, Tristan, went on a week's holiday to Cyprus with his partner, Sue.  Tristan asked his dad, my human dad, Gary, if he could water their garden plants while they were away.

Behold, a couple of hanging baskets in their garden!



Of course, this being the British summer, the slightly warmer part of the British winter, my human dad, Gary, only had to water the plants once during the week Tristan and Sue were away in Cyprus. Yes indeed, it rained almost the entire time they were away.  He went over there when the rain had eased off to a torrential downpour....

I recall when Gary used to have a really beautiful garden.  He'd ask Tristan if he would like to help with the gardening.  "You must be kidding!", would be Tristan's response.  

Now Tristan just loves a bit of gardening and is so proud of how well his flowers are turning out.  He was thrilled that dad took some photos.  Sue is such a calming, pawsitive influence on Tristan.  

Sunday, 19 June 2016

Hatred Will Not Win.

You have witnessed and I have witnessed, the horror that hatred has done.  Lives have been lost. Hearts have been broken.  Our beleaguered, fragile planet has been tormented by those who would use the poison of hate to frighten us.

You will not succumb and I will not succumb, to the insidious epidemic of hate that causes havoc on a worldwide basis.  You have seen the awful events in Orlando.  You have seen the daily occurrences of the war-torn nations.  Humanity fleeing in a desperate attempt to live a life of freedom, of compassion, of love.  You will be aware of the murder of a member of the British Parliament, Jo Cox. A woman of peace who has left behind a husband, a son aged five, a daughter aged three, a mother, a father and a sister.

This has been a terribly sad time in the UK.  I have reflected on the cold-blooded, callous murder of Jo Cox and ask the question, "why?"

Since her murder last Thursday afternoon, I have felt a sense of humanity at its finest.  Those who have fought a ruthless battle during our European referendum campaign, have demonstrated that beyond the bitter politics, lies that loving sense that we must all be here for each other.

Britain weeps.  The world weeps.  In peaceful defiance, the world will embrace the ideals of love, not hate.  Hatred will not win.


Thursday, 9 June 2016

Chevrolet Choo Choo.

Wednesday morning, May 18, 2016.  Destination, Dovedale, via Ilam, in the Peak District National Park.  Dovedale is about fifteen miles east of our starting point, Leek, Staffordshire. Whenever I see the road sign for "Ilam", I always think of eleven o'clock in the morning. Coincidentally, that's around the time we arrived at Ilam on our way to Dovedale. 

This was going to be a three day camping adventure for my son, Tristan and his good friend, Dominic aka "Dom."  Tristan had suggested I take the shorter yet, oh so narrow, winding road via Ilam, to get to Dovedale.  A road so narrow that whenever a vehicle came the other way, I had to take evasive action, pull way wide to the edge and avoid upsetting the sheep.  I will refrain from any sheep jokes.  
Here they are, all ready to go on their camping trip.  Dom is on the left and that makes Tristan on the right.  The photo was taking from a very wet Dovedale car park, which you might refer to as a parking lot.  

Before leaving, I told them if they needed a ride back, I would come and get them.  They had planned walking the fifteen miles back to Leek.  
As I headed back out of Dovedale, I decided to take the easier route back to Leek.  A road somewhat wider than the one we came in on.  Then I got to a crossroads.  One way indicated Ashbourne, Derbyshire, the other, Buxton, Derbyshire.  Knowing Buxton very well, I thought, what the heck, head towards Buxton for a different, scenic drive back.

Then it happened.  My very smooth running Chevrolet, suddenly became a violent, trembling beast of a car.  The car was shaking real bad and I heard a sound that made me feel like I was in the cab of a steam train.  Wasn't quite sure whether to apply the accelerator or look for some coal to shovel.  This went on for about five minutes.  Then the car ran smoothly for the next five minutes.  I was feeling somewhat panicky but I did maintain my composure.

The drive to Buxton seemed to take forever and then some.  The car continued with its five minutes of smooth driving and five minutes of living in an earthquake zone.  Buxton, where for art thou, Buxton.  Finally after about thirty minutes, I arrived in Buxton.

I knew that the journey from Buxton to Leek would require me driving the A53, one of the steepest stretches of road in the UK.  Predictably, as I headed up the steep road, my car started acting up again.  Somehow, I did continue to stay calm.  I visualised the end of the thirteen mile stretch that would get me to Leek and to a mechanic I trusted.

I explained the symptoms to the mechanic and I got my Chevrolet booked in for the next morning, Thursday morning.  

After taking my car to the mechanics, I waited for the outcome.  Of course, my car needed one part and the part wasn't going to arrive until Friday morning.  The part, to bore you, was called a caliper, which is part of the braking system.  How odd that such weird happenings from my car could be related to the braking system. 

On Friday morning, my phone rang.  It was my son asking me to come and get them.  At this point, I still didn't know if my car had been fixed.  I explained to my son what had happened to my car.  I told him I'd phone him back.  Luckily, the car was fixed.  Within the hour, I had paid for the repair and got the two dudes in what was now a very smooth running car.

I know, by my standards, I rambled on in this post.  To summarise, which is a good starting point for anybody who, heaven forbid, skims through my posts, all turned out well.   I stayed calm.  That, in itself, is a momentous step forward in my ongoing challenge of not allowing anxiety to overwhelm me.

As for Dom and Tristan, they had fun during three days of torrential rain. 

Wednesday, 1 June 2016

Trying To Not Make A Brick Of Myself.


If you click on the link above, you will be taken to a map that shows a brick wall under construction along the Canadian border.

This is a photo of what you will see in the link.  Moose, sorry, bear in mind, that the brick wall has gone a considerable distance further west than in the picture you see. 

                                 
Although the above video, courtesy of the British TV show, "The Last Leg.", hosted by an Australian, pleads with Canada to build a brick wall, I want to try and help any Americans wanting to still flee to Canada.  You're welcome, eh. 
If you're an American and you wish to get the heck out and head north, you'd better hurry up because the wall is now around the Montana/Saskatchewan border.  If you live on the East Coast of the USA, pisser, because you've got some travelling west to do to still get across the border.  If you live in Alaska, you wont find any wall. 

Upon arrival at the un-bricked portion of the border, you will be welcomed by a moose, a serenading Mountie, some hoser wearing a lumberjacket, a guy wearing a hockey uniform, Justin Bieber, Celine Dion, William Shatner, the band members from Rush, Michael J. Fox, Jim Carrey, Avril Lavigne, Shania Twain, Alanis Morrissette, Mike Myers, Dan Aykroyd, a beaver and Pamela Anderson handing out small samples of maple syrup.

Good luck, eh.....

Friday, 27 May 2016

Blogger Interview With My Alleged Human....

Hi there, yes it's me, Penny the Jack Russell dog and modest internet superstar!

This is the fastest pawst I ever pawsted.  I've noted that my human dad, Gary, has been interviewed over at the adorable human, Chrys Fey's, must read blog site.  I wonder what he's been rambling and ranting on about?  Please, if you haven't already visited her site, be gentle with any comment you leave.

Thanks and here is the link to Chrys' site :

Blogger Interview with Penny's Alleged Human, Gary aka "klahanie"


Pawsitive wishes,

Penny!

Tuesday, 10 May 2016

The Alphabark Challenge, 2016! And Then Some!


Hi there, yes it's me, Penny the Jack Russell dog and modest internet superstar!  I do understand that you've been waiting and waiting and waiting, to the point of uncontrollable frenzy.  Yes, that's correct, you've be dreaming of that alternate challenge to that A to Z thingy. Then again, maybe you got so mired in the alphabet, that everything you see and do now relates to the alphabet.  You might need an alphabet detox!

I do realise that I was going to put up this pawsting on May 1.  The situation is such that my human, Gary, being so dog-tired, has needed my constant attention.  I do worry about my human dad.  I was going to pawblish something brand new.  Instead, I'm going to cheat because I need to keep looking after Gary.  So here goes with a past pawst and then some! 

"A" if for "Arf!"
I'm having a laugh

"B" if for "Bark"
Sometimes I snark

"C" is for "Chihuahua"
Hello, how are ya? 

"D" is for "Dog"
A pawblished blog

"E" is for "eekPawblishing"
If that's your thing

"F" is for "Feline"
Having a whine

"G" is for "Gary"
How very scary

"H" is for "Howl"
Without a scowl

"I" is for "Insect"
A bug I detect

"J" is for "Jack Russell"
The dogs that hustle

"K" is for "Klahanie"
Pawmoting I see

"L" is for "Loon"
A Canadian tune

"M" is for "Metrosexual"
Such a transport ball 
On all things Metro
Didn't you know.

"N" is for "Noodles"
Oodles of noodles
You stick them in water
Just like you ought ta
And what have you got
One silly noodle stuck to the pot

"O" is for "Ogopogo"
Way to go, go, go
Canadian lake creature
Is what we feature
Ogopogo can kick Nessie's rear
Take that, you Loch Ness dear

"P" is for "Poodle"
Which rhymes with noodle
Doggy jumps through hoops
And you scoop its poops

"Q" is for "Query"
Hi pawblisher, deary

"R" is for "Rivet"
Don't you forget
The noise of a frog
Over there on a log
There you go
I toad you so

"S" is for "Sasquatch"
Go have a watch
Don't say, "Big Foot"
Or you might be kaput

"T" is for "Toadstool"
How very cool
No, not that load
Not a stool from a toad

"U" is for "Unread"
Start over, instead

"V" is for "Vacuum" 
Instead of a broom
Knowing my luck
My vacuum wont suck

"W" is for "Weird"
Oh, how they cheered
For the Alphabark
That's having a lark
Not lark as in bird
Haven't you heard

"X" is for "Xerox"
Photocopy your cocks
Place your butt on the screen
How very obscene

"Y" is for "Y am I doing this?"
Am I taking the p**s?
Look below
And you will know

"Z" is for "Zest"
My good-natured jest
I did this with Zeal
How do you feel? 

The above, a recap
That makes you clap.

Sadly, my friend
We've come to the end
That sums it up
From this lovable pup
Just one last thing
I do bring.

 Not quite the end
My human friend
If you did the alphabet
Without regret
Well done to you
This be true
Yes, the A to Zed
Something I dread
Or pawhaps the A to Zee
If you're a Yankee
Seriously though
What do you know
I nearly pawmoted
Duly noted
The alternative to the alphabark
Oh no, it's back to snark! 
Here you go
To end the show
A rufflections pawst
From your lovable host!

Thursday, 31 March 2016

THE ALPHABARK CHALLENGE, 2016!

Hi there, yes it's me, Penny the Jack Russell dog and modest internet superstar!  If you, pawchance, are visiting this site because you were eagerly anticipating my alternative to that other challenge that relates to the alphabet with 26 letters, I convey my humble apawlogies.

I got to thinking that it would be unfair to compete with the A to Z Challenge.  This is due to the obvious fact that you would be so in paw, um, awe of me.  Indeed, my human friend, if you're doing that alphabet thingy, my satirical pawsts would put you in an hypnotic trance.  A trance so pawfound that you'd forget all about the A to Z.

So, being such a thoughtful dog, I've decided my rebellious, bordering on cynically, snarky challenge, shall commence on May 1, 2016.  Besides, I'm rather busy looking after my human dad, Gary.  If only I could somehow snap him out of his chronic fatigue.
Yes, make a note in your calendar,  Circle May 1, 2016.  Heck, it might even take your mind off all those reflection pawsts about reflection pawsts about reflecting about the A to Z Challenge, 2016. Yes, those reflection pawsts that go on and on and on...so much so, that you suddenly realise it's April Fool's Day, 2017, just in time to start all over again.....

Yep, the comment section is switched off.  If you're doing the A to Z, I sort of wish you all the beast, um, all the best.....